I don't know yet???

eleven

Cole rubbed his arms as he watched his siblings walk down the sidewalk in front of him. They skipped together and laughed, Jude wearing the Batman jacket he had gotten back at the group home and Kassidy wearing a dark green one that was actually Cole's.

    They had been out for a week and a half now, and this was the coldest day yet. Snow was falling heavily, clouding Cole's vision with white as he just kept trudging forward, scouting out somewhere for them to sit down for a while, maybe eat something. Most places would just tell them to come back once they got their parents.

    Cole finally settled on a McDonald's down the block from an apartment building: cheap, warm, and usually featuring workers lazy enough that they wouldn't care about little kids wandering the streets without parents. Cole didn't know how long he could keep this up, but it would have to be quite a while.

    After ordering the cheapest meal possible from a bored-looking lanky teenager, Cole threw some money across the counter and took the food back to a little booth in a dark corner. They ate in silence, trying to avoid any possible attention from the other people eating in the restaurant.

"Where're we gonna go?" Kassidy asked once they got back on the street. She kicked up clouds of snow with her worn down tennis shoes and shivered.

"I don't know," Cole said. "We'll find somewhere soon, though. I promise."

Kassidy frowned. "Why can't we find somewhere now? I'm cold and I'm tired of barely sleeping."

Cole rolled his eyes subtly. She was cold. "Kassidy, I don't know where we can stay. Any adult would send us back to there."

"What was so bad there?" Kassidy asked. "We got food and beds and a nice place to stay. It's better than here!"

Cole sighed and peeled back a little bit of his sleeve, staring down at his forearm. There was a long gash running along it, now scabbing over in yellowish-green color. "It's not better than here," he uttered. "Trust me."

Kassidy crossed her arms. "Jude, what do you think? Which place was better?"

Jude shrugged, remaining silent. He clearly just wanted the argument over with, no matter what he really thought.

    She scowled, groaning slightly. "C'mon! Agree with me! You know I'm right, Jude! You know it! We should just go back!"

    "Kassidy, trust me: this is for your own good. It might not seem like it, but maybe someday you'll understand."

    "You think you're always right because you're older, but you're not! I'm right this time! You're being stupid!"

    Cade lowered his voice, whispering, "Kassidy, quiet down! Someone will notice us!"

    "I don't care!"

    Cole sighed. If he didn't argue, she'd quiet down. That was how it always worked. But it was hard to ignore her, because he knew that she was kind of right. Really, if they went back to their foster home, Kassidy and Jude might be fine, and that was what mattered in the end. Maybe they should've just turned back.

    But then again, it could've changed. They could've gone after Kassidy and Jude, and that risk was too strong to let Cole be comfortable staying. And, above all that, Cole was selfish. They didn't stay because he didn't want to. He didn't want to because it wasn't good for him. It was good for them. So good for them: to feel wanted, to have a stable home, to feel like maybe someday someone could love them.

    Stupid. Selfish. Should've just stayed. At least then they'd have a home. It's not like you matter anyways. You blew their fucking last chance.