Illness

1

Cha Jae Hee
9:30 am

"Hey! earth to jaehee? Earth to jaehee? Are you there?" Solhee waves her hands infront of me, again my brain is dozing off. We are here at the library to do our research project but then I feel oddly dizzy. I started to feel this dizziness since last week and I feel nauseous too
"You've been spacing out? What's wrong? Something bugging you?" She drowns me with questions while leaning her head towards me,
"Uh, I just feel dizzy and drowsy...I don't know..." I tell her as I massage my temples
"Well, Let's take you to the clinic and let Ms. Kwon check on you, might as well take a rest there" She says as she stands up from her seat and ready to accompany me to the clinic
"Oh...okay..." I reply feebly
She fixed her things and my things first before proceeding on our way to the clinic.

"Do you eat on time?" Nurse Kwon asks me,
"Yes ofcourse" I faintly reply, but I lied though. I don't really eat that much because I really don't have any appetite even if Solhee treats me something dainty
"Mhm...well you will need a rest first then I'll go make an excuse slip for you so that you can go home, okay?" Nurse Kwon says as she ushers me to a clinic bed
"Thank you Ms. Kwon" I tell her. She just smiled in reply and left the room, suddenly Solhee came with a worried look.
"Are you feeling any better now?" She asks me franticly
"Don't worry okay, You look like an old widowed mother" I mocked to her
"Wow, is that how you say thank you to your best friend who brought you here in the clinic?" She tells me
"Sorry, I was just trying to loosen you up okay? Plus, you don't have to worry that much though...I am perfec---" I suddenly held both of my hands to my mouth
"Jaehee?! What's wrong?" She asks panickly
"I...wanna.." I ran to the bathroom as fast as I could, with Solhee tailing me. She opened the door for me and I went straight to the toilet to throw up but nothing came out,
"Nurse Kwon!" She yells as I throw up hard, still nothing coming out

What's happening to me?

× × ×

"Ya Jaehee, remember what Nurse Kwon told you okay? Always eat on time and take these medicines after meal" she tells me like a mother while I open my apartment door
"I will mom" I reply to her
"Has your illness affected your brain that much too huh? I'm serious here" she tells me as she pinches me cheek,
"Ya ya! Ouch! Okay okay...I will" I yelp
"I will be calling you to check on you okay?" She tells me as she hands me the stuff we bought
"Okay, thank you for everything Solhee" I thank her as I pull her into a hug. She have always been there for me
"I'll treat you any thing for this, I promise" I say between our hugs
"Ya, what matters now is that you get better okay? That'll be enough to thank me" she insists
"Okay bye" I bid to her
"Bye! Take a rest okay?" She tells back to me
"I will and you take care too" I yell to her and she just waved and smiled in reply. I closed the door and went to the kitchen, and took out the things we bought from the market.

She filled the bag with healthy foods and fruits, some medicines and vitamins too that was prescribed by the school doctor. Most of the medicines are Antidepressants, maybe the doctor percieved that I am going through deppression, common cases in youth though. I put them all in the fridge and went to my bed and layed down.

I wonder what he's doing now

My fingers are itching to touch the keys of my laptop again, but then it made me remember what Solhee told me at the market

"If this illness you're going through is caused by that Hakyeon again, I am going to strangle you and your laptop to death" she tells me sternly

She really do know me

"Fyi, none of these are caused by him and to tell you...I am just experiencing anorexia or whatever they call that" I lied. I diverted my attention to the fruit section but still, she's staring at me

"What? Don't..look at me...like that?" I retort to her
"I swear to God Jaehee, why are so into him? I mean he does nothing but harm to you, aren't you tired?" She asks me. I want to protest but no word would dare to come out of my mouth, I just remained silent in defeat
"For petes' sake Jaehee! Move on from him already!" She tells me

I don't know how Solhee...

I don't freaking know how...

I stood up from the bed and went to the kitchen to look for something to eat. I cooked ramen with eggs and went to the couch and ate there.

*facebook notification*

My laptop made a sound

I remembered, I forgot to shut it down because of what happened a while ago. Funny it's battery haven't drained yet

I just stared at my ramen and thought of what to do instead

Shit

My feet insensibly led me to my laptop and brought it back on the couch with me

Sorry Solhee

I went to my wall and there I saw another post from him. It's a photo of a girl smiling happily with bed-hair and wore a big white shirt that I assume is from him

His caption says,

Waking up to this😜😁

Plus the comments

Kim Nam Joon: Use protection my dear! LEL
Lee Tae Hyuk: Advance congratulations to you bro
Kim Haera: Boy or Girl?! Kidding!
Choi Ji Won: any summarization of last nights' activity?

I suddenly felt like I was shot right to the heart and a tear had escaped my eyes like shit just happened. I stood up from the couch and fell on my knees, the floor was so cold and even my room itself started to feel cold

What am I going to do with this stupid heart of mine?!

"Aaaah!!!" I cry at the top of my lungs. I don't care if I disturb my neighbors. I feel so miserable and wretched , Why can't my heart forget about him like how it did to our friendship?

"Fuck my heart! my life! Everything!" I began to cry like there is no tomorrow. Again, my stomach feels uneasy. It's like my guts is about to come out of my mouth

I'm such a cheap desperate girl

× × ×

She suddenly covered her mouth with both of her hands and ran inside her bathroom. She opened the toilet and started to hurl. At first nothing came out, but finally she felt things coming out right after. She expected to see the ramen she ate a while ago but instead, no ramen or anything disgusting is seen in the toilet. She froze upon seeing what's inside it,

She stood up from her knees, one hand covering her mouth because of shock

She saw flower petals

White rose petals to be exact

How is this even possible?!

2016

[Sugoi desu-ka! ヾ('▽｀;)ゝ]