As I board the train I look back
At what I am leaving.
The weeks where I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world.
The things that felt comfortable and safe,
Never more but also never less.
The rush of my first adventure, never knowing that it wasn't always that special to you.
You kept me from growing,
You locked my feet to the ground.
But the worst part is that I always had the key.
The key that would let me go free,
And allow me to grow any way I wanted.
And instead of using that key
I put it up
Up on the highest shelf I could find.
Thinking that if I couldn't reach the key
then maybe
Just maybe
I wouldn't ever want to use it.
But I did.
And it took far too long for me to realize,
That if I was tall enough to put it up there
Then I was tall enough to get it back.
But even after I finally got that key back
I was still trapped.
While I was with you, you had closed a thousand doors.
And after fighting to get even one open
All I ever found
Were more locked doors.
I don't know why it took so long.
For me to admit to the people I loved most
That I needed help
That I needed to get out.
And with you doing nothing to try and stop me
To keep me from leaving
And never coming back.
Me and my friends got to where we are now,
Hand in hand about to board the train.
The train away from you.
And for a moment
I almost hesitate.
And I look to my friends
And with some unspoken language
I am reassured that everything will be all right.
And with that
I take that final step.
Onto the train.
The train away from you.
