꒰ SENSES ✔️ ꒱ - CHANGKI ˎˊ˗

3. smell

Nothing revives the past so completely as a smell that was once associated with it.

— Vladimir Nabokov

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EDITED - 1 MAY 2020

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It had been a few weeks of failed attempts to contact Kihyun. Changkyun couldn't get over the fact that they weren't seeing each other anymore. He realized how much he held onto Kihyun and that it didn't even matter what or who he was. Not anymore. All that mattered was that he actually missed him.

At first he was only sending messages, but soon he even started calling the pink haired boy. He was sure Kihyun was just sitting and waiting for Changkyun to give up on calling, so he could continue using his phone.

After so long, visiting the club Kihyun sang in, sounded like a great idea... Until Hoseok didn't tell him Kihyun didn't work there anymore. He refused telling him anything else.

So there was him, sitting in bed, considering sending voice messages. It was the last thing he could do and he could only hope that Kihyun would listen to them even though he highly doubted it. It was still worth a try

"Kihyun, I'm really sorry," Changkyun spoke with a shaky voice as he held the voice button in their chat. "I'm ready to change myself. I just want to be friends with you again. And I... Miss you. If you ever picked up I would've had the chance to say that earlier." For a while he was silent. He had so much more to say. He knew he had. But none of these words were coming out.

"You know I'm not really good with words, so, if you want to, come draw with me by the river tomorrow."

When he was done, that's all he had energy for. He left his phone aside, rubbing his face with his palms.

--

Kihyun was hugging his pillow, staring at his phone while listening to the voice message from Changkyun.

When it was finally over, he locked his phone and rolled on the other side, staring at the piece of paper Changkyun had written his number on not so long ago.

Almost four months had passed since they met and already one of them was being spent by them not communicating.

Kihyun wasn't sure renewing that friendship was a good idea. He knew that homophobic people didn't change that easily. He had met a lot, therefore he didn't quite trust Changkyun about that.

But he was sure that the rest was said with full sincerity. The way his voice sounded made it obvious that he really meant it when he said he missed Kihyun.

The pink haired boy screamed into his pillow in an attempt to release the stress that had piled up inside him. The stress was obviously still there. And he couldn't clear his thoughts at all.

He wiped away the tears that were pooling in his eyes and got up, walking to his wardrobe. He opened it to find his folder from the times when he used to draw.

He was wondering if he should give Changkyun a second chance, if he should go draw with him again.

He didn't want to waste his day for a person who wasn't worth even a second of his time. And that was exactly the problem. Changkyun didn't deserve Kihyun's time. But, on the other hand, the fact that he was so innocent (though in a way that made him seem quite dumb) was what made Kihyun weak.

Kihyun slowly pulled the folder out of the wardrobe, checking if he had unused paperboard. His lips slightly curved upwards as he saw the blank papers.

--

Changkyun was sitting on the opposite side of where he met Kihyun as a change of scenery.

The day was rather quiet and there weren't many people around. Or it was just that it was rather early on a weekend for people go out.

The only loud thing around was the sound of the river, which wasn't annoying but actually calming.

Changkyun didn't want to draw yet, so he was just looking at the water while drinking coffee, mixed with a solid amount of energy drink.

Most people would question Changkyun for putting energy drink instead of sugar in his coffee, but he liked it that way. It tasted horrible but he liked it for completely different reasons.

The hours were passing agonizingly slowly and it felt like he had been waiting the whole day, but it turned out to be just two hours.

Kihyun was always on time, so he was probably not going to come. Changkyun had sent him a text message to also tell him the hour he was going to arrive there.

The ashy blond male started drawing, discarding the thought of Kihyun. At least at the end of the day he was going to have a finished drawing if not anything else.

--

A sigh came out of Changkyun's nostrils as he checked his phone to discover that six hours had already passed.

He was right and it was more than obvious. Kihyun wasn't going to show up.

He got up, putting his things in his folder, ready to go, when he saw someone on the opposite side of the river. Exactly the same someone Changkyun had been waiting.

A wide smile spread across his face as he was heading towards the pink haired male.

When he finally reached him, he didn't even say a word, didn't ask him why he was so late. He just dropped his things and hugged him tightly.

He felt his heart flutter when Kihyun also wrapped his arms around him.

"Thank you for coming," Changkyun whispered, burying his face in the crook of the other's neck, inhaling his scent. "Thank you so much."

"I'm really sorry I'm late," Kihyun spoke as fast as his heart was beating. Even Changkyun could feel it. "I stayed up really late last night and I slept through my alarms."

"So you were sleeping until now?" Changkyun snorted. The pink haired male just nodded.

Changkyun didn't want to let go. It felt as if he did, he was going to lose Kihyun again.

"You smell like strawberries."

"It's from my shampoo," Kihyun chuckled at how sweet Changkyun was.

Suddenly, the blond pulled away, grabbing Kihyun by the shoulders and throwing him a creepily serious look. "Please, never change it. Ever. If you change it, I will sue you."

Kihyun started giggling loudly. The younger didn't even seem threatening with that look on his face, though he tried so hard. He looked rather cute.

It was already too late for drawing. And both of them weren't even in the mood for that.

"Do you want to come over at my house?" Kihyun asked. "We will just play games, nothing else!" He was quick to add as he saw Changkyun's expression.

"Okay then."

They started heading to Kihyun's house, Changkyun carrying both of their folders.

And the younger really wondered if Kihyun's whole room smelled like strawberries, too.