The blade (A niall horan fanfiction)

Chapter 3 *MAY BE A TRIGGER*

As I made my way to my bed, I heard something I wish i wouldn't have. "Ugh, I can't believe you did that Niall, the whore probably has fucking herpes. Plus, she super nasty. You should hang out with me, babycakes," I looked through the crack of my door and saw Niall and the blonde slut from the circle, Gigi, running her fake nails up and down his arms, "besides, we both know she wouldn't put out." Niall let out a half chuckle before saying, in a thick, slurring, Irish accent, " yeah, i may have to go get checked for an STD tommorow." Gigi smirked before dragging him to our guest room, and shutting the door. Hot tears streamed down my face, as their words replayed in my head, constantly telling me that I was a whore, and ugly, and unpopular. I knew these things weren't true, but I started to slowly believe them. I ran to my personal bathroom and pulled out my relief. My razor. I locked the door, just in case, and pulled up my skirt. All of my previous scars were visible now. They ran crookedly from my hips to above my mid thigh. I took the razor in my hand, observing the sharpness and the blood from earlier cutting. I ran the blade in a straight line on my skin, over and over again, until the blood ran off my thighs, to the floor. I cried silently, thinking about how worthless and pathetic I must seem to everyone else. How worthless and pathetic I was. I got up off the floor and cleaned up the mess on the floor, then I washed the blood ofc of my thighs. I got out of the bathroom, then ran to my room, slamming and locking the door. I looked into the mirror and pulled my top over my stomach. All i could see was fat. All I could think was fat. I got so angry at myself, I don't know why, and i punched myself in the stomach hard, until it was sure to leave bruises. I was pissed, but i I was numb, so I couldn't do anything. I jumped onto my bed, landing with my tear stained face in the pillows. All i could think now, was: How do I get out of this trap?

A/N Hey beauties, I just want to let you know, that no one is worthless. Ever. It doesn't matter what the situation is, you are not worthless. And just remember that somebody loves you. At least i do. (: keep your heads up and keep on smiling (: SOOOO.... here's the song... "If we could only have this life for one more day, if we could only turn back time..." Take a good guess! Love you (btw the pic on the side is how i imagine Gigi to look like.

-Irishboobear