I sat there on a bench looking at my engagement ring while absentmindedly siping the smoothie I got from the the little street shop on my left. I feel guilty. Grayson doesn't deserve this. I'm grown enough to know I shouldn't be doing what I've been doing.
Grayson is my fiancé and we have been together for 2 years but we've known each other for longer.
I first met him in senior year of high school but I never really spoke to him. I had a boyfriend named Kevin and he was terrible to Grayson. After high school Kevin and I broke up. Then I went to college and found out Grayson went to the same college. I finally started to speak to him, he was very hesitant to talk to me, but I don't blame him. Through the high school years Kevin was horrible to him and I stood by Kevin's side. It took a while for him to be comfortable with me but eventually we were best friends.
We lost touch after college and went our separate ways. I started to build my successful clothing line and he became the best technology inventors in the world. He reached out a few years back and we started dating then eventually a year and a half later he proposed. This relationship is very different from all my previous ones.
I used to date bad boys because I loved the idea of a guy being bad but good for me. It never really turned out that way because they were just bad to everyone including me. Eventually I grew tired of being used. Grayson is a good guy and that didn't really appeal to me at first but I realized that he is a lot more interesting than I expected.
I love him, I really do but I'm now bored and I need something more. It's really not his fault for why I feel this way so that is why I tried to fix it myself. That didn't work so well.
I love him, I really do but things are fizzling out. I think he noticed and he sent me flowers today, adding to my guilt.
My phone starts ringing, it's Grayson. I stand up to walk.
"Hey babe," I say.
"Taylor hey, did you get your flowers?" He asks
"Yes I was just about to call to thank you," I lie. I need to tell him what's on my mind.
"Your welcome, I feel like something has been wrong between us. So I was thinking of maybe having a date night so we can reconnect or something." He is the best and this is breaking my heart, "I don't know maybe because our work but we haven't been close lately but we--"
"Babe I kinda cheated on you." I blurt out.
"What do you mean you kinda cheated?"
"I went on a date with Kevin since we've been talking--"
"Why the fuck are you talking to Kevin." He shouts as I expected.
"I don't know what came over me but I reached out and--. "
"Did you kiss him or sleep with him?"
"No but I-I might have." The words tumble out of my mouth before I can stop myself.
"KEVIN. Kevin- he - what hurts now is your talking to him after everything he did to me."
"I understand but--"
"But do you really, Taylor, he hates me that's never gonna change."
"I'm sorry babe. " he hung up the phone. I was struggling to breathe he sounded so hurt. I guess I wanted to convince myself that being with gray was enough but Kevin can be so charming that I lose myself in him. I need to explain myself. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going because I didn't see the car...
