Please daddy don't leave me

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 Do you ever get those times where you feel alone? That you  don’t fit in when everyone else around you fits in somewhere. Fits in with a certain group; the popular girls, the bad boys, the jokers. Everybody has someone who fits in with them. Someone who shares the same interests... Everybody BUT me. Here I am, another new school. This is the 6th school in a matter of just 2 years. Where ever I go I do not fit in. They just see me as the lonely girl with a father in the navy and no mother. The girl who is abandoned due to her dads line of work and ends up being sent to care homes whilst awaiting for her father to return home from another long voyage.

He said this time would be different. Yeah like every time. It won’t happen again we can finally settle. Be a family again. He says it like I haven’t already heard it a million times. Now I just know to never trust him. He  lies. We always move around, never staying in one place long enough to make friends. And if I did make friends.. well soon as they hear I am leaving they don’t care.

The only time I feel myself is when I dance. It’s the time I am free. Free to be happy, express emotions. Let out anger. Pain. Free to be creative, defy the odds and challenge the impossible. Dance was her legacy and it’s a legacy I will continue and chase the dream.

Nicole POV-

“I want you to trust me, this time is different. While I am away you will live with Miss Smith.”

Well thanks dad that’s helpful. Is it really different? Yeah I may not be in temporary care but here I am on a Sunday morning sitting on my bed in an unfamiliar house with an auntie I never knew existed until yesterday. I wish I could turn back time to when dad stayed home with me. I wish mum was still here but thats impossible. But can't it be the two us us against the world? "please don't leave me" I begged. Even after my pleas he still left. Things really have chagned hey.A new college tomorrow where I will be shying away from others, hiding in the shadows but I will be unable to escape the attention and gossip of being the new girl. The centre of attention and conversations. Great >.<

Don’t get me wrong being a dancer I long to perform which will put me in a spotlight on a stage to complete my first live show, but being in the spotlight for the wrong reasons such as being a ‘new girl’ no thanks. Even if I did make it as a dancer I will have to get over the fear of audiences to be able to enjoy the performance, but at least with dance you have music and a costume to hid behind. Sometimes other dancers to shadow you away. But when the music flows through your body and you do not dance to the music you become it you don’t need to hid because on that stage you are you and the only thing that matters whilst on stage is here and now.

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