Two Homophobic, Hypocritical Assholes (Donald Trump x Mike Pence Crack-fic)

sMuT (wtf am I doing?)

 Mike Pence elicited a satisfied sigh as he lowered his nude body into the bath. Steam enveloped his being, as warm beads of water rolled down his porcelain figure. He was tired and stressed from a day of hating on gay people and Hamilton and needed to relax. Sinking back in the liquid embrace of the bath water, Mike let his worries flow away like the water still flowing from the faucet.

I should probably turn that off, it'll waste water, Mike thought. Nah, fuck it. What does it matter if I waste water? I'm fuckin' Mike Pence!  Mike thought smugly, immersing himself not only in the water, but his ego. 

Too deep in thought to notice, Donald Trump slipped into the bathroom, only clad in a skimpy white bathrobe. "Oh, Mike~" Donald purred coquettishly, alarming said man. Mike had lifted his head just in time to see Donald drop his robe. Mike's jaw dropped at the size of Donald's massive member. (Mike assumed it was around fourteen inches.) 

Donald smirked, seemingly triumphant with the expression on Mike's face that he caused. Donald tauntingly swung his hips, gliding his fingers up and down his orange-tinted flesh. "You like what you see, Mike? Of course you do, I'm fucking Donald Trump. Who wouldn't adore me?" Donald asked, running a small hand through his wispy gold tresses. "I should've won the Miss Universe Pageant, because I'm gorgeous, unlike those disgusting, fat monsters called women." Trump muttered to himself. 

Mike gulped, but the knot forming in his throat wouldn't go down. It seemed it kept tightening, like the sensation between his legs. There was no denying it: Mike was getting aroused by Donald's suggestive dances. Mike bit his lip, the urge to stroke his cock beginning to grow unbearable, as the tip of his acorn had breached the surface of the water and the steamy air kissed it. 

A smirked tugged at the corners of Donald's lips, as he continued his movements, now strutting toward Mike. His glorious fupa protruding like Mike's stiff, erect penis. "I see you're having some trouble trying to contain your little friend. Does he want to come out to play? Cuz Daddy always has time to play..." Donald teased, his hand dipping dangerously close to Mike's length. A barely audible groan tumbled past Mike's lips as he felt Donald's finger graze his tip, now leaking with pre-cum. Tauntingly slowly, Donald curled his digits around him, and began to tug.

In deft motions, Donald began to jerk Mike like a pro. Gasps and groans escaped Mike, as Donald was furiously wanking him. Donald then leaned over the rim of the tub, and slipped Mike's meat into his mouth. Bobbing his head in unison with Mike's whimpers, he sensually deepthroated him, using one hand to beat what he couldn't fit in his mouth, and the other hand cupping and playing with his balls. 

Mike's breath caught in his throat, and in a hoarse, ecstasy-laced voice he groaned "I-I'm... I think I'm g-gonna--!" Mike's guttural utter was cut short when thin ribbons of semen shot out of his tip into Donald's gaping maw. Donald swallowed thickly, and removed his lips from Mike's cock with a loud, suctioning sound.  Donald glared at Mike with an irritated scowl.

"Silly Mikey, you're not allowed to cum unless your Daddy says so!" Donald chastised.

"Y-yes, Daddy..." Mike replied, ashamed and embarrassed, but excited nonetheless for what he'd experience next.

"Now I'll have to punish you..." Donald drawled huskily into Mike's ear, lightly nibbling on his earlobe. Mike shivered, tingles jetting up through his nerves at the feeling of Donald's hot, moist breath against the shell of his ear. Donald's lips trailed from behind Mike's ear, to down his jawline, to his neck. He sucked specifically hard once he found Mike's sensitive spot before skimming his tongue over the irritated skin, pleased when Mike inhaled sharply. Donald pulled away, admiring his work, which was a noticeable purple bruise. "This hickey proves that you're mine, and no one else's, got that?" Donald barked  in a tone laced with not only desire, but authority. Mike nodded meekly in response. "I can't hear you!"

"Y-yes, Daddy..."

"Good. Now I want you to count for me, okay Angel?" Donald asked, laying Mike down with his ass in the air (still in the bathtub). He then smacked Mike hard on the ass, leaving a bright red handprint on his wrinkled cheeks. Mike groaned in pain and pleasure, feeling his Daddy's rough palms spanking his ass.

"One..."

Smack!

"Two..."

Smack!

"Th-three..."

This continued up until twenty. Mike's ass was now inflamed with crimson blotches, and he was a panting mess. With beads of perspiration dripping down Donald's neck folds, he once again positioned Mike, but this time, with his asshole aligned with his cock.

"You've had your fun, Kitten, but now it's Daddy's turn..." Donald growled lustfully, ramming his humongous cock into Mike's tight, little asshole. Mike cried in agony, feeling blood rush and trickle from his now torn asshole, as he attempted to hold back the tears that had welled in his eyes. Donald was ruthless, pounding into Mike with the force of a buffalo stampede.

The wet sound of skin-on-skin contact surrounded the room, as Mike sobbed in pain, and Donald grunted in bliss. His thrusts grew sloppy and slower, but hard nonetheless, before he released his hot seed inside of Mike's asshole.

Donald pulled out, his cock dripping with a coat of his nut, blood, and shit. Mike's face was blotchy and flushed from exhaustion, tears, and from being so flustered. 

"D-daddy... Please hold me?" Mike pleaded, earning a grin from Donald.

"Anything for my sweet prince. You did such a good job." Donald praised as he took Mike into his arms in a warm, sweaty embrace. 

Suddenly, Donald felt a searing, sharp pain course through his nerves. Donald's eyes grew as wide as saucers, as he slid onto the floor of the bathroom, blood pooling out of the fresh laceration in his neck.

Mike loomed over him, a dark, eery look glinting in his icy blue orbs, and a knife gripped tightly in his hand.

"B-baby... Why...?" Donald asked, his voice cracking, as he was on the verge of tears and his life. Mike chuckled sadistically. When he spoke, his voice was dripping with venom and hatred.

"Sorry, Donald, but we all know you're not allowed to be gay in America... Besides, I'll make a better president in January than you ever would have." Mike sneered, as tears trailed pathetically down Donald's droopy, chubby cheeks. 

A white-hot hatred flooded Donald's being as he stared up at the man who he thought he loved, as his skin paled and his lips and fingers turned blue.

"Man, fuck you skank-ass nigga..." Donald hissed before his vision grew hazy, and his life ended.

Just like that, his life was stolen from him by the man who had stolen his heart.

THE END I'M SORRY THIS WAS JUST TOO FUCKING FUNNY. LOL I'M A SINNER AND I HATE DONALD TRUMP AND MIKE PENCE. HONESTLY I BET NO ONE'S READING THIS, BUT THERE WILL BE NO PART TOO CUZ I'M TOO LAZY.