No Matter What

Prologue

     I couldn't understand why he did it. I said I was sorry. I wanted a feeling of independence, like I wasn't one of those girls all wrapped around their guy and I can go out one night without him. Didn't think it will cause him to fall down the well in his mind. I called and I begged for him to change his mind but it was too late he had already changed.
     The first day I met him was like a ray of sunshine through a sliding door. He was radiant, I mean it, he just had this walk and flow with him that was enticing. He was my cousin's best friend, I know scandalous. All summer they would hang out and I hated it. I hated him, he was always rude and obnoxious to me. Thought he was the top dog and I made it my mission that summer to bring him down.
I was all ready to strike and then shit hits the fan. Why did I have to fall? That question still haunts me cause out of the all of the guys in this 5,000 populated town, it was him.
       My decline happened with an invite of the lovely sort from a family member. I was to attend a game of manhunt at approximately 10 o clock on a Friday summer night. I put on my most appropriate attire which was all of the black clothing I own to blend in better with the night. Only when I was out did I learn it was a trap, a secret code, and most of all I was drafted into a war I wanted no part in. My cousin and him weren't the only ones attending this war they had troops, only of four showed up. As the only girl, I stay silent as they caused their damage throughout the street but he didn't and I wish he did to give me more ammunition against my hatred for him. He hung low and walked with me. He actually started a conversation with me and I enjoyed it.
      We made it to their destination, the middle school. They wanted to get to the roof of the school and star gaze. I wasn't ready for the life of the buzzkill so I went along struggling with my weak limbs. I thought we would go down the way we came up but no these boys were out for fun. Parkour they called it as they jumped off the roof and rolled onto the feet. I didn't complain so I tried it but I slipped, eyes closed tight as I fell into his arm gripping his shirt tight for dear life. As I opened my eyes I saw him. His ocean blue eyes in the street light and he put me down with the most care in the world and of course I had to ruin the moment. With the words, " that was some crazy trust fall."  Like why play it off I should've kissed him but no momma ain't raise no hoe. So I played my position right like a shortstop picking up everything I can get on him. I was the modern day Nancy Drew. I gather my clues up and I invited him just like inviting a lion into a den. I was screwed with a capital screw, I knew it at the time when I let him hold on me tight. I gave him my number and it went down hill quicker than humpty dumpy ever went down a hill. He would knock on my window and try to start conversations. Little by little he was getting information about me to write on a sticky note to put on the bulletin board in his mind. Till it go to the point where he knew me like the back of his hand. He knew my orders, my favorite stores, the way I blush when I was nervous, the spots on my body that is sensitive to touch, and my insecurities in life. He knew it all, so much to the point that he could be the one to end me. My own personal apocalypse to love.
I'm not saying I regret the love that we share. I'm just saying I was dumb to play victim when I was the one to load the gun and give it to him tied in a bow. Like that Taylor Swift song, when your 16 and someone tells you they love you, you have to believe them. That was me 16 years old in love thinking I met my soulmate for the rest of my life. So scared to even kiss each other after a month of dating.
Being with him was like a constant adrenaline rush. We always had to be doing something whether it was last minute trips to amusement parks or walks on the beach taking pictures. I was his little roadie, always wanting to be there with him. Everyone told me he was no good for me. That he would corrupt me and leave me broken-hearted and fucked up to say the least. But I didn't care because I wanted to be the girl to fix him and make him into the best version of himself possible. Sadly, no one warned me that isn't the way the world works sadly. So me 16 with big dreams and ambition to change the world and to change this boy came crashing down the moment he let me into his twisted mind.
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A/N
I have to give a disclaimer that as though this book is purely fiction it does have some roots into being about someone that I know who I think deserves to have this story told of a part of her life when she changed. So don't get sassy or feisty about how some parts are depicted.
So with that being said please keep on reading it will only get better I promise.