Invisible

Chapter Six

Wednesday, August 14th

Some moments in our life surprise us more than you would ever think possible. Tonight was one of those moments. This would literally be the first girl to enter my bedroom and the only thing I could think of doing was not appropriate by any means. But by the glory of God, here I was climbing my stairs with Charlotte in tow.
My voice was shaking but I still managed to get out the directions to my room. "So uh, my room is just down that hall and to the left."
Up until that moment, I had somehow managed to keep my cool but I couldn't lie and say she didn't make me nervous. She made me more nervous than that time I smoked pot with Gregory for the first time and thought my mom was going to smell the smoke coming from my bedroom.
Charlotte kinda laughed and gave me a strange look. "Well aren't you going to come in there with me?"
"Uh yeah, I can do that." I led her down the corridor until we reached the outside of my door. Slowly turning the knob, the door swung open and she walked in before me. "Sorry about the mess."
"I don't mind," Charlotte spoke softly, not turning around to look at me, "it's nice."
My room was a dark blue color complete with white molding on the floor and ceiling. The walls were covered in dumb movie and band posters and in the far left corner was a semi-large bookcase which sat beside my computer desk. I wasn't really that messy, but I was still slightly embarrassed.
"Thanks. Normally I don't have company."
The atmosphere was filled with this almost melancholy feeling, like the room was overwhelmed with an equally shared sadness that could only be explained by someone who's experienced suffering or loss. That was a complete shock to me because I expected the opposite since this girl brightens my entire world with just one look.
She finally turned and looked at me, giving me a soft smile before she spoke, "you don't have a lot of friends, do you?" I shrugged my shoulders and sat down on my bed.
"I don't really need that many, ya know?" I sighed, "I've always liked being on my own, I guess I'm what they call introverted."
Charlotte was exploring my book case, browsing at my vast selection of Si-Fi and Thriller books. "Yeah," she chuckles, "I can tell."
I laugh, "What's that supposed to mean? Just because I like to read, that automatically makes some weird hermit guy with no friends?"
"Yeah, pretty much."
She makes a face at me before sitting in my computer chair, "Any guy who spends his time on the Internet, playing video games, or reading is obviously not getting any action."
Frowning, I realized that her entire statement was true. I suck at life.
"To be fair, I know a lot of guys who do all three of those things and still get loads of pussy." I'm just not one of them, apparently.
"Okay, name one of your friends who are getting," insert air quotes here, "loads of pussy."
I smile and point my thumbs at myself, "This guy right here."
Charlotte bursts out laughing and then looks up at me through her thick eyelashes. "You? You, Jackson Gilmore are not a virgin?"
"Yeah, I lost it like freshman year to this girl in my Algebra class." I've never been very good at lying but right now I was on a roll.
"No way! You're totally lying." Yes, I am totally lying but I'll never tell you that.
"Uh, totally not lying. It was epic."
"Alright, fine. What was her name?" Oh shit, I hadn't thought of that yet. I needed to think of something fast but nothing was coming to mind. Charlotte begins to stare at me, obviously waiting for my reply.
"Meredith, her name was Meredith." I mentally slap myself in the face. Meredith? You don't even know a Meredith. You should have picked something more slutty like Amber or Sarah. Charlotte squints her emerald eyes at me, almost like she's scrutinizing my words.
"Meredith huh? You'll have to introduce me when school starts. I'd love to meet the girl who conquered the great Jackson Gilmore." My palms started sweating as I realized that would never happen because Meredith doesn't even exist.
"Uh," I started talking really fast, "I would love to introduce you but she moved away last summer actually." Her eyes begin to shine and I have a feeling she knows I'm lying.
"Oh no, that's a shame." Either I'm better than I thought and she actually believes my bullshit or she pity's me and is just going along with it.
"Yeah, totally. She was a great girl, I miss her a lot."
Something shifted in Charlotte's tone of voice, almost like it was laced with jealousy. "Really? I thought you told me you've never had a girlfriend before?"
My smile falters but I recover fast, "oh I didn't lie. Meredith wasn't my girlfriend. She was just some girl in my math class. Nobody important." She smirks at me, raising her eyebrows.
"Just some girl in your class? What are you, some macho player that just pretends to be innocent to get the girls?"
That made me laugh. Shaking my head I counter, "God no. Damn Charlotte, is that really what you think of me? Meredith was a nice girl, we use to study together and it kind of just happened. It wasn't anything special, just heat of the moment." That sounded believable right?
"Okay well then, what was it like?"
"What do you mean? It wasn't anything special. You know, the usual mediocre sex between two adolescents." I had no idea what I was talking about but for whatever reason, Charlotte seemed more confused than I was. Suddenly, her eyes perked up and she smiled widely at me.
"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"
Charlotte leans forward and the following sentence comes out of that gorgeous mouth of hers: "I want you to show me." I'm pretty sure my heart stopped, either that or I went deaf because I could not believe she asked me that.
In disbelief, I open and shut my mouth before the words could form. "Excuse me? What did you just say?"
She shrugs and gets up from the chair, "I want you to show me." My entire body starts to vibrate when she sits down beside me and places her hand on my right knee. Holy fuck, what is even happening right now!? A long list of swear words take over my internal dialogue as I try to slow my racing heart beat. I do the only thing I know how; I chuckle and try and play it off like I had no idea what she was talking about.
Scoffing, I reply, "come on Charlotte. It's sex, everyone knows."
"Yeah, maybe everyone except me." I freeze and turn my attention to her. Is she a virgin!? There's no freaking way.
"Wait, what are you trying to say?"
Charlotte shrugs and falls back onto my bed. Shocked, I get up on my knees and lean over her body. "There's no way that you're a virgin. You of all people."
She sits up and pushes me down, "yeah? What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Guilt washes over me as I realize she thinks I'm judging her.
"Fuck. Charlotte, I didn't mean it like that. It's not a bad thing. I just meant I'm surprised, is all." She stares at me, obviously waiting for me to elaborate. "You're so beautiful and nice," I could feel myself blushing as I looked down at my fiddling hands, "I just figured you wouldn't be. Not that you're a slut or something." Looking up at her, the smile is once again on her lips. I wish I could kiss those lips.
"Well thanks. I just feel like everyone is in such a hurry to lose theirs that they do it with just anybody." Regret washes over me, feeling horrible for lying about my own virginity. "I want to lose it to someone special." That very instant, I had never felt so wanted in my entire life. This girl, just said she wanted to lose her virginity to someone 'special' and yet, she just asked me to bang her like, two minutes ago. It's like she practically proclaimed her love for me without even realizing it.
"Charlotte," she peers up at me, "it's okay." I desperately wanted to say something romantic and sweep her off her feet but I didn't have the words. We just sat there on my bed, staring at each other without saying another word. Very slowly, she starts to lean into me and that's when I think Charlotte Anderson is going to kiss me. My very first kiss is going to be with someone like Charlotte Anderson. Quickly, I lick my lips and close my eyes. The tension between our bodies was rigid and I felt like I was going to erupt into flames. Right before she reaches my lips, however, her mother calls her name from downstairs. Are you serious?
"Charlotte, sweetie!" She pulls abruptly away from me, her entire face flushed with this deep crimson color. I so desperately wanted her to just do it, just so I could have something to think about after she left.
"It's time to go!" Please don't go. Stay here with me. My heart felt like it was going to break. Okay, not really but the disappointment was real.
"Okay mom, just a second!" We both rise and she smiles at me, proceeding to exit my room. I was about to say something but before I can, something unexpected happens. As she turns to walk out my door, she runs back and does the unthinkable; she stands on the very tips of her small toes and gently places a chaste kiss upon my cheek. Giggling, Charlotte takes off and races down the stairs, leaving me there to ponder what it would feel like to have those lips pressed against my own. I hear the front door shut and I rush over to my window and move back my curtain. Just as my eyes focus on the outline of her body under the stars and moonlight, she turns and looks up at my window. Without knowing it, she makes eye contact with me and I swore I saw her smile before continuing to walk away. I've been high a couple times, but my body has never felt like this. No amount of weed or other form of drug could amount to the dosage I just got from Charlotte's kiss. The adrenaline in my body was unreal as I lay back down on my bed and touch my hand to my cheek. I swear I could still feel her warm lips pressed to, even though she had left. There were two things I was sure of. One, something had sparked in me tonight, something I thought had simmered out a long time ago. It was my passion for life and her kiss reignited it. And two, Charlotte might actually like me back.