A Writing In Need

Chapter 4: Midnight write

   I wake up thinking its 7. Its really only 2AM though. I toss and turn trying to fall asleep but I only wake up more. I lay flat and stare up. Why now? Why right before my second day of school? Every now and then I check the time to see how long I have been up and how much more sleep I could be getting. With every minute that goes by, I get more and more bored. I start to think about what I can do that will make me tired, but the only thing that comes to mind is to get a cup of water. I know if I drink water then I will be even more awake.
   I dont care.
   The heat gets to me. So I get up and walk to the kitchen. I open the fridge hoping nobody will wake from it. I grab a cup and poor the water into the glass. Its hard to see how much water is in the cup so I just stop thinking it will be enough. After I put everything back and finnish my cup of water, I head back to my room and turn on a small nightlight lamp so I have enough light to do atleast something. I think alittle more. Random stuff. Like how might tomorrow be, or rather, how later on today will be. How my life has come to this. What my life will be like as I get older. Pretty soon, I start thinking about the boys in my class and Star.

   Star. Thats what I could do. I can write. If I write now then I wouldnt really need to write after school. I grab the book from under my bed, grab my pencil and start writing.

             ~September 7th 2016~
  Its kind of 2:30 in the morning but I can't exactly fall asleep so I figured I could write to you. It feels like every time I write, there is something I keep forgetting to mention. Granted I have only been writing for a day or two. I wish you were here. Everything would be alot more fun. I just know it. Once again. I feel like im forgetting to write something. Umm... I had one of the worst dreams ever. I had a dream last night that I brought my book with me so I could write to you on my free time. Everyone came to me are started teasing me. They took my book and called me pithetic.

   A tear drops from my eye as I continue writing.

   Then I saw someone who looked like you. I dont know whether to wish it was you or not because 1, it wouldnt really matter. Either way you still arent here in reality. 2, Im scared to what you might have done. Even though you were the one who told me to write. In my dream, all you did was keep away from me. Im suprized this worked. My hand hurts from writing. Well, I dont know if I will write later or just skip to tomorrow so...bye for now.

   I close the book and place it back under my bed. I rest my head and fall back asleep.

                              *****

   I awaken to the sound of a door opening and closing. I know its time to get up. The time in my dream went so fast it felt like I never even slept.

  "Well your up early." My dad says to me before I enter the bathroom.

  "Yea. Had a difficult time sleeping." I close the door and brush my teeth. I exit the bathroom and go strait back into my room to get changed. Pretty soon I have to leave to get to school.

   I do my usual and play my music while I wait for the bus. Today is a rainy day so the bus takes a little longer. I dont mind. At least it isnt raining yet. I have my umbrella right next to me just in case. Thankfully the bus comes soon enough. I get on but there arent any seats. So I stay standing listening to my music. I try and hope that the bus takes its time because since I dont hang out with anyone, I look pretty lonely. I hate looking lonely. It shows everyone that im useless. That im a nobody. Thats why I stick to my music. Music can never let you down.

  All you have to do is replay the song. I have another 7 minutes before we enter the school so I hang around making it look like im looking for someone. I guess I am on the inside. Im looking for Star. Im looking for her everywhere. Even though I know she isnt here. This was exactly what I didnt want. I didnt want to miss someone because I know it will only make things worse. I let time go bye so that I am heading to my classroom. I sit down and start my day.