Bruises Of The Heart

Brain Damage

The shit that goes on in my mind will make your head spin . My mind is constantly going 1000 miles a hour , some days I have to really just sit down and wonder what keeps me going . Some days I be so stressed , that I don't know either I wanna be on this planet , or I wanna keep going , because I'm not built to quit . My mama never quit , she never gave up and she had three kids and all I have is one . Of course I get up and I think what if this , what if that , all these what ifs and I'm not doing anything about it I feel as if I'm weak. I lack in a lot of areas but the blood I have running through me won't let me show it. Everyone has that one person they can count on , and go to , but why when I'm going through a crisis I feel alone , I feel deserted I feel like nothing as if I'm invisible , like I'm calling out for help and nobody hears me. Nobody understands me , he'll I don't understand myself sometimes , maybe I need a shrink to just talk all my problems out , because the things in my head I couldn't say out loud cause I'd be in a straight jacket locked a cubicle. Then I think of my mom , three kids , abusive relationships , running and running until she took a hold on her whole life and got tired of running. Well I'm tired of running not from people , but from myself , if she can do it I know dam well I can. If I keep thinking about it and not do it what kinda person does that make me , I'll just gain brain damage from that thousands of thoughts . Just because people stop moving don't mean I have to park to so I had to gather my thoughts and just do it . Thanks mom for the inspiration 👌🏽🙏🏼