the way you make me feel

chapter 5

I woke up to someone breathing down the nape of my neck and froze. Slowly I turned around trying to not wake up the person who held me in a tight death grip, coming face to face with a sleeping Christian I instantly relaxed. He looked so peaceful with his blond slightly brown hair in different directions and his pink full lips slightly apart as if he is breathing through it, His highly defined cheek bones so tempting to touch ,his chiseled face. You could see the dried tears on his checks and the black circles under his eyes as if he didn't sleep at all and I instantly felt bad for making him comfort me, I'm a horrible friend. I brought my hand up to his face and ever so slightly I touched his face tracing every detail from the shape of his eyebrows to his nose the his cheek bones, finally I came to a stop by his beautiful pink lips I traced the outline of it as if I was in a trance I leaned in but, immediately stopped when Lissa came yo mind.'Even though Lissa has done the unspeakable I won't do the same to her' I came out of my trance when christian moved to make himself more comfortable and pulled me to him.
"Hey" said christian in his sexy morning voice.' No its not sexy! I'm just tired'
"Hey... How you feeling?" I asked him trying to not show that his voice was not affecting me.
"I'm OK" I knew he was lying.
"Don't lie to me Christian."I told him as I layed my head on his chest making him wrap his arms around my waist.
"I'- I'll be ok so you don't have to worry about me...... The real question is are YOU ok?" He asked emphasizing on the you part. I didnt know what to say, was I ok?, am I ever going to be ok? Millions of questions were running through my head as I thought of the perfect answer
"I- I think so...*sighs* I don't really know Christian, he was the only one I loved, the only guy I EVER gave myself to and now that  he doesn't love me anymore I feel dirty, like he didn't really deserve anything I gave him." I said as I sat up turning to face him.

"Well he didn't deserve anything you gave him or you because a real man wouldn't have done what he has done... The real man you deserve is out there somewhere going crazybtrying to find you and make you his queen because you obviously deserve to be treated like a queen." Said Christian. I was shocked, no one not even he said things like this to me and I felt special when Christian said that to me. I tried covering my blush with my hair and I never blush not even Dimitri could make me blush because I would always come up with a snarky comeback when he complimented me but, with christian I couldn't think of anything.... What is happening to me?