Fall Before Flying

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

After Heath dropped me home, I spent all day in my boxed room. My walls are covered in photos of models, of quotes, of me and Heath. I admired every single photo in my room and especially the ones with the love of my life in. I lay on my bed for the whole day, papa roach, sleeping with sirens and lots of other bands played loudly in my headphones. Music saves me from a lot of stuff. It takes me away from the world and into somewhere magical.

I checked my phone and the time was 5:20pm. Heath would be here soon so I took off my headphones without letting the song finish. I left them on my bed near my pillow and walked slowly downstairs. When I got to the last step, I stopped and sat down. My converse were right next to me so I pulled them on. As I was getting up I saw heaths car pulled out side my house. He was early, that's not like Heath at all. I checked my phone again and the time said 5:27. I was still staring at his car, then I saw him get out, I knew he was coming to the door so I just waited to hear the knock. 8 minutes went by and there was no knock. I got up from the sofa and I saw him walking back and forth talking on the phone. He looked happy. Maybe it was just his friend he had just seen. It couldn't possibly be another girl. He loves me right?.

Another 3 minutes passed and the knock finally arrived. I took a deep breath and opened the door with a fake smile shining upon my face. ''Hey babe,'' he said in his husky voice. ''You're early, but hello handsome,'' I replied. He walked into the house without even kissing or hugging me, I felt unwanted to that moment.

All day i was thinking about where he had been and if he would come and see me, but now he's here i feel safe.

I already packed my bag earlier to stay at his house, not far from mine. He asked me a bunch of questions like, you looking forward to tonight and I hope your not tired. I felt a bit uncomfortable when he asked me them. I mean we have been together for 8 months and we haven't had sex, maybe he wants to. Maybe that's the reason he invited me over.

We left my house and drove to his. His car was a dark blue Volvo with a sticker on the back saying 'ride or die'. I don't really pay attention to his driving as I just stare out the window and choose the songs. Today's song was Hollywood whore by papa roach. It was Heaths favourite. ''Where were you today babe?'' I said to him politely. "No where, I'm here now arn't i, don't worry" he said in his possessive angry voice. I said nothing and I carried on staring out the window.   

When we arrived at his house, we made dinner, spaghetti bolgnese. I let Heath do all the cooking because I can't stand food. Heath thinks I'm keeping all my food down, but I'm not. I can't. It's better if he doesn't know.

I don't understand why Heath is acting weird with me, I have a feeling he doesn't want me, I mean who would?

Anyways, we sat on the sofa watching a comedy programme, Heath was drawn to the screen, not even noticing my existence. Heath finished his food fast, i still had a full plate. "Not hungry fatty," he said laughing. "That's not funny Heath, I ate before I came," I said stuttering. I lied, I didn't eat. The word fat scares me. Why would he say that knowing how much I hate my stomach already? Silence filed the room. "You know I was only joking with you babe, don't be like that" he said touching my face. I said nothing. I walked over to my bag and picked up a hoodie that previously belonged to Heath. I was cold. I put it over my head, and then put my arms in the sleeves, being careful not to hit my cuts. They burn.

I walked back over to the sofa and noticed Heath was clutching on to his phone again, just like he was in Nandos. I stayed silent. "Be back in a sec babe, just calling my mum," he said fast. As he left the room, I defiantly knew something was wrong.

I got up quietly and walked to the door that Heath left. I placed my ear to the door and I felt the coldness against my skin. "Claudeen, you know I love you, and there's no one else I promise, your my girl," Heath said distantly. I didn't need to hear anymore, I turned around not making a noise and bent down. My head was in my knees and tears were falling from my eyes. I got up and ran over to the door. I grabbed my bag and walked outside. I slammed the door behind me. Thought after thought filled my mind as I walked down the dark road. Was he using me? Did he just want sex?I knew he was cheating on me, but I didn't want to believe it. I thought he loved me, but he played me.