The Mark of a Death Eater : Sequel

Chapter Fifteen

Narcissa found me in her garden a little while later. She sat down quietly, her pale green robes matching the little flowers. We were both silent, me toying with the apple I had no stomach to eat and Narcissa gently stroking a long petal.

"You gave Rudolphus a black eye," she said.
I looked up. There was a small smile playing on her lips.
"He was joking about... About -" I couldn't say his name.
"I know."

She picked a white flower and spread it against her hand. A star bloomed against her fingers.

"I found a scarf here yesterday. It looked like it had been here a while."
I didn't answer.
"It was blue. There were initials stitched into the corner," she continued. "A.S."
I sighed. "It was Arianne Sylvermist's. She was a friend of mine at school."
Narcissa raised a thin eyebrow. "Really? I don't remember an Sylver in Slytherin."
"She was a Ravenclaw."
"Was?"
"I don't know if she's alive. Caspar took me to her house a few weeks ago. She could be hiding. Or... killed by death eaters. Because... Because of me."
The blackness spread inside me and I pushed it down.

There was another silence, broken only by birds chirping in the tree above us. I said what had been playing on my mind since I left the house.
"I don't have any friends here," I said. It came out a little sadder than I wanted it to and I felt a sense of shame. I was a 16 year old girl. I sounded like an 8 year old.

"Who told you that?" Narcissa asked, not unkindly.
"Rudolphus," I mumbled, feeling even worse.
"Rudolphus," Narcissa scooted over next to me, "is..." She couldn't seem to find an appropriate word.
"A huge-ass-liar?"
Narcissa laughed. "Yes, that."

The she grew serious. "Emma, I need to know if you're going to be going back to Hogwarts this year."
I shook my head. "I don't know," I said. "I do want to go back. Hogwarts... it's my home."
Narcissa nodded. A home, that she could relate to.
"But I don't think I can stand to go back," I dropped my voice to a whisper, "and see everyone I left behind." I took a deep breathe. "My friends... Daphne will still be there. She's a Slytherin and her blood's purer than anyone's, she has nothing to worry about. But everyone else... If Arianne is still alive, she'll be in danger because of me."
Then I realized something and froze. "She was Zayn's friend."
I was talking more to myself now than to Narcissa. "She's going to blame me for Zayn's death. Every student is going to blame me for Dumbledore's death."
Narcissa picked the petals off her flower slowly, thinking. "Is that the reason then? Because you're afraid?"
"Not completely," I admitted. "There are lots of reasons. But... mostly because I'm afraid of everything."
Narcissa nodded thoughtfully.

She hesitated, and then probably decided the better of it. "Might I bring something into light?"
I frowned. "Sure."
"Staying here, it's not going to be good for you. How long do you think you can stay like this before he comes back?"
"You mean... The Dark Lord?"
"Of course I mean The Dark Lord. He may be away now, but he could come back at any time. And then what? You get your first opportunity to kill someone?"
I let out a huge breathe of air. "I can't do that."
"You say it like you have a choice," Narcissa argued. "You realize which side is winning the war, Emma? Which side you're on?" She grabbed my arm.
I finally looked up to face her and found her eyes imploring me. "You're on this side Emma, and everyone you care about is on the other side. You can't keep believing that you're betraying them." I could feel my face burning and I looked down. "All the people here, they want to be here. They believe they deserve this. You're an exception. You have to start convincing yourself, Emma. Or you're not going to stay for long."

"Not everyone," I corrected.
"What?" Narcissa sounded annoyed.
I met her eyes and surprised at how steady my voice was, said, "not everyone.
You say that everyone here wants to be here, that they love him, that they're loyal to his cause, but you lie. I see the way you look at him, and the way you look at your family."
Narcissa had gone very still.
"If you had it your way, it wouldn't be like this."

Narcissa let go of my arm.
"Don't ever say that again," she warned. "Don't even think it."
She stood up, brushing white petals and dirt from her dress. "I can't protect you forever Emma. Go to Hogwarts. You'll be safer there than you will ever be here."

I watched Narcissa stride away, feeling more alone than ever. I knew Narcissa wanted to keep me safe, but it felt like she was sending me away. I thought of returning to Hogwarts as a pariah; I couldn't do it.

But, I wouldn't be completely alone, I realized. I'd have Draco.

I was lost in my thoughts when Caspar returned, on his face the meanest look I'd seen yet.
"You're being summoned," he said with a smirk.
I rose, the Daily Prophet dropping onto ground.
"What does he want?" I asked, dread pooling in my stomach.
"Something you had coming a long time."

As I walked through the hallway of the Manor, I glanced at everyone who I passed, who had stopped to see me walking behind Caspar. Rudolphus stared me down, his eye indeed beginning to blacken. Caspar was undoubtedly enjoying my suffering - he almost had a bounce in his step. If Bellatrix was here, I wouldn't have been able to shut her up. Rudolphus was right. I was good at making enemies.

I almost ran to the drawing room, eager to get away from everyone's stares.

He was in the room, standing as always, in front of the fire place. The fire outlined his figure, making him seem thinner and taller, more gaunt.

"My Lord," I murmured, bowing low.
"You summoned me?"
The Dark Lord paced the area in front of the mantelpiece silently, a wand twirling between his fingers.

"It has come to my attention," he began, "that your loyalties waver."
His voice had no trace of emotion. It was worse than when he was mocking, worse than when he was cold. Because I had no idea what was coming.

"My loyalties are with My Lord, as always." The lie came easily.
"Is that true?"
I heard a low hiss as it filled the room.
"Nagini is skilled at detecting liars. I smell nothing but lies on you."
I involuntarily took a step back.
"Can it be, that you are not devoted to me? That you do not believe in this cause?"
"No My Lord." I was pleased that my voice was not shaking, but I would probably collapse, given my luck.
"Then the time has come to prove it."

"Prove it? My Lord?"
"Prove yourself."
He stopped pacing, and though his silhouette was dark in front of the fire, I knew he was watching me.
"Prove that you are one of my loyal servants. Prove that you aren't a coward."

He told me what I had to do.