After Arlington

Chapter 11: Maddy

It was supposed to feel like the suffocating weight had been lifted from Maddy's shoulders. But, it didn't quite feel that satisfying. Instead, relieving herself of the secret that had been holding her prisoner had planted a new seed of doubt and brought with it a frighteningly uncertain future.

"So you're not going back to Connecticut?" Maria asked, stretching her long limbs over Maddy's bedspread. She'd returned from Spain with darker skin and a near-constant hangover, but the holiday seemed to have refreshed her spirits.

"I don't know," Maddy said, sighing and peeling the last of the Blu-tack from one of the remaining photographs hanging on her wall. "I haven't heard anything. It was all really anti-climactic actually. He didn't believe me."

"Asshole," Maria muttered.

Asshole didn't even begin to cover Francis Greene.

"But at least his family would have nothing to hold over me if I never went back," Maddy said quietly.

"Well, it's not like you were going to school anyway."

Maddy tossed the photo into the pile of them she'd already removed. "Hey, you're not supposed to know that. If you tell Mom I'll murder you."

"Whatever," she said. "Are you doing anything today? We could go get a spa treatment and drink so much tequila we forget about boys?"

Maddy's stomach flip-flopped, and she couldn't help but smile. "I'm actually catching up with someone today."

"Chloe?" Maria asked. "She can come with us. I'm sure she can get away from that sex-god of a boyfriend for the day and spend some time—"

"Maria, that is so unnecessary," Maddy interrupted, screwing up her face. "It's not Chloe. It's someone else."

"Someone else? Do you even know someone else?"

Maddy shot her a look of warning. "Of course. He's a friend."

"He's a friend?"

"Oh, why do you have to make everything so inappropriate?"

"Who is it?"

Maddy rolled her eyes. "Knowing who you've been hanging out with lately I'm sure you'll find out eventually."

"No way," she said. "You still talk to Piers?"

"Sometimes," she muttered. Only when Maria caused trouble with his little brother.

"Fine. Leave me."

Maddy shook her head and abandoned her photo-removal operation to look in her closet. It had been a long while since she had left the house for any reason other than to drive to William's apartment to see Chloe. But for some reason, it didn't feel so absurd to be changing into regular clothes.

Maria left to try and convince their mother to go to the spa with her, and Maddy turned to the mirror. Slowly, she removed the dressing gown and pajamas she'd been wearing.

Her pregnancy had left her with more than just the torturous memories of her daughter. Her stomach was now streaked with stretch marks – along with her hips and boobs – and she was half-certain that she didn't even want another man to see her down there again. Though her insecurities felt so small compared to the guilt and grief that thrived within her, they suddenly felt a little debilitating.

Maddy reverted back to the baggy sweaters and loose jeans she'd worn when her stomach was slowly growing. She wasn't sure she could ever squeeze back into the tight party dresses and stiletto heels she used to live in ever again.

He'd suggested meeting at a pub for lunch seeing as she'd canceled her flight, one on the fringe of town where none of their past friends would ever venture. She was thankful for that at least. The thought of running into someone like Sophie Rutherford made her shudder.