The Bookworm entered her room, shutting the door behind her. She felt a piercing pain in her chest and a sinking feeling in her stomach. She couldn't breathe. She was suffocating, beads of sweat were beginning to form on her forehead. She could feel her world crashing down upon her. Her energy was drained and she couldn't even pick up her phone. Her hands shook like crazy. Her heart ached.
The Bookworm was experiencing her first heartbreak.
She despised the boy who touched her heart and crushed it in his hand. But at the same time she wished he would come back and hold her in his arms. She had absolutely no idea what she was going to do. She didn't know what's the next step. She wished she could ask her friends but first she needed to put herself back together. She didn't know what she hated most, this feeling of helplessness or the feeling of her first love walking away from her like she was just another conquest of his.
Sitting on her bed, she thought about him. His perfect face, his eyes, his smile, the way he lured her into his trap, his convincing words, the sense of security she felt around him. Then she thought about how he left her, without reason, without explanation. She thought about the way he pushed her away when she tried to hold him, his words were like a knife slowly slicing her veins. She could vividly picture his silhouette grow smaller as he walked away from her until he disappeared.
This moment The Bookworm converted all her feelings of love into burning hatred. That moment she lost her trust in everything. She lost her faith in people and in humanity itself. She knew she was wrong and that there were still good people but she couldn't help herself. She could feel her walls coming up. She loathed every second she spent obsessing over him. She made a silent promise to herself that she wouldn't trust anyone again. She vowed that she wouldn't let anyone hurt her. And with every second that passed, she felt herself grow stronger. She knew from now on it was just going to be her against the world.
The Bookworm looked for a consolation, an escape in her room and just across her bed were people whom she could open her heart to. Even though they were from whole different worlds, she always felt a part of them whenever she sat down with them. Laying on her study table, were a pile of new books waiting to be read.
She picked up the book on top and opened it. She took in the smell and feel of a new book. She loved how it felt against her skin. She loved the bright blue cover with black and white writings. Even though this book was released more than a year ago, she was reading it today. She had waited for the perfect day to read it and she felt today was the day. The Fault in Our Stars seemed like a perfect choice for the situation.
The Bookworm was so engrossed in the book that she didn't realise the time that had passed. In these few hours, she had fallen completely in love with Augustus Waters. When she reached the middle, she paused and felt a growing happiness in her heart. She smiled with contentment and felt immense gratitude towards John Green for creating Augustus Waters. She loved Gus and was satisfied with fact that her heart was in good hands.
At least, she thought, Augustus won't break my heart.
But The Bookworm was so unaware of the fact that in page 261, even Augustus Waters would leave her.
*~*~*~*~*
More coming up!
-s
