Deal With It

New Beginnings

Hello Wattpad, I am once again trying my hand at this writing thing, and we shall see how it goes.  Feedback and constructive criticism are welcomed. I have thick skin and do not offend easily.  I want to know what readers think. :) I hope you enjoy.  

Prologue

There are many things in my life that I am not proud of.  I have never claimed to be the perfect friend, the perfect daughter, the perfect sister, or the perfect person, but that is just it.  No one is perfect, and those who claim to be reek of bullshit from miles away.  Throughout my life, I have suffered through the constant ridicule of ignorant assholes.  I have faced many obstacles that no child should be burdened with, but unfortunately must endure.  Yet, here I am, with my head held high, and my pride and self-confidence intact.  No, I am not the perfect person, but I am me.  Finally, I will get my fresh start to be whomever I choose to be.  No one has to know about my dark secret that burdens me each and every day.  No one has to know about my past.  No one has to know the real me.  They will know who I choose to let them know.  I can be the girl who is constantly surrounded by people, the ideal socialite. I choose to be the girl who walks alone not because she is an outcast, but because she is making a statement.  I have given up on the human race, and can only depend on myself and those closest to me.

My name is Cameron Anderson, Cam for short, and yes, I am a girl.  Sometimes I wish my parents would have given me a gender specific name instead of a gender neutral one, but over time, I have grown to love my name. A name doesn’t have to define you, and I learned that lesson in the fall of 2011 from the person I have chosen to spend my life with.  I had recently moved to California with my mother, and though most teenagers would throw a fit when they are told they have to move away from their friends, from the life that they have known and start over, I could not have been be happier.  Fate had given me a second chance at a new life.  A new beginning.  No longer would I have to deal with the closed-minded people I had the displeasure of calling my peers.  I didn’t have to be afraid to go to school every day, weary of what the boys would say or what the girls would do.  I didn’t have to come home and cry until my throat could not take the pain anymore.  I could just be. I was free to be anyone I wanted to be.  Free to lead a fearless life.  That move is the greatest thing that had ever happened to me, and I accepted it with open arms.

Chapter 1- New Beginnings

Fall 2011

We moved to a small town of Sonoma in northern California on a Friday evening.  My mother and I flew out from Connecticut that afternoon, and the moving vans, which had set off since Tuesday, were scheduled to arrive that morning.  We have an interesting relationship, my mother and I.  I guess. If you can even call what we have a relationship.  We are not really close per se, but we do hold conversations with each other on occasion.  The thing is, we both aren’t very social people.  Like mother, like daughter, I guess. So, because of the lack of a relationship between my mother and I, we never really talked about how the move would affect us.  She never asked if I was okay with it, and I never asked if she was fine with it either.  We both just kind of went along with it.  Who knows, maybe my mother does actually have a maternal bone in her body and realized how difficult it was for me living in Connecticut.  Maybe that made her decision to uproot our lives that much easier.  All I can say is I am glad that she got the job offer to work in California, and I am glad that she took it.  You see, my mother is a business attorney at Johnson and Michaels Law Firm.  They have an extension in San Francisco, and they offered her a transfer to follow a big client that moved out to California this past summer.  She took the job in a heartbeat.  Maybe she needed a change in scenery just as much as I did.

So, here I am now on a Monday morning, lying in bed and for once in a very long time, actually looking forward to the day ahead of me.  With a content sigh, I get up from my bed and tak a nice long, warm shower to help wake me up slowly. When I step out of the tub, I wipe off the condensation from the mirror and take a good look at myself.  My long brown hair is a tangled mess dripping down my back and on to the floor.  My skin is red from the hot water, but I can see it starting to fade.  A pair of green eyes stares back at me, hopeful and curious, and for a moment, I almost forget that I am staring at myself.  It has been too long since I have seen anything but sadness in those eyes.  It was refreshing.