thirty day challenge

my fears

19. Your fears

-dedicated to dan bc he shares my love for music. you'll see how this is relevant if you read on-

well, i'm going to start with the common one. my phobia is needles. i absolutely hate them. my mum is a counsellor, so she has tried to analyse why because i've never had a bad experience in the past - i've just always been shit scared. when i was younger, i used to run around screaming before a blood test or vaccination in the nurse's office/room thing. now, i just freak out internally and try to avoid them. but i've started this thing recently when i do get them (i've had two blood tests in the last three months): i listen to music. (a year ago, when i had to get teeth taken out for my braces, i listen to my favourite band Florence and the Machine. two injections ago, i listened to Roar by Katy Perry and at my last one, i listened to Stand By Me by Ben E. King*. idek why i just told you that.)

i'm also scared i'll never love. like as in, fall in love. so many people don't get to, and i really don't wanna be one of those people. it's so sad and without love, life must be so empty (i've said that in here before). i guess it's just something i'm really passionate about and i believe in.

i'm also afraid of my academic success. i mean, i am in the top classes, but i'm easily distracted and prone to worry. i just need to get my priorities straight sometimes and "head in the game" (quoting HSM there ;)). i'll probably take some time off wattpad when my GCSEs come up this Spring/Summer.

*I couldn't resist putting the song on the side. it's beautiful and the music i was brought up to, along with Van Morrison (with whom I share a birthday! c;), Sam Cooke,  The Temptations, Louis Armstrong, John Lennon, Otis Redding, Elvis, Frank Sinatra, Percy Sledge, Alannah Myles, The Jackson 5, etc. btw, the song was used/made for (idk) this film, also called Stand By Me, and it's amazing and touching and wow - you should totally watch it.