Black Is A Color

Chapter 1

It's a blur. A distant memory.

Oh how i wish i could forget everything within a heartbeat. it's still imprinted in the back of my mind as if it were a scar. A scar i didn't intend to happen. Yet i was blamed for it all, I'm always blamed for everything. Ever since i was 10 it's been this way. I've always looked for answers and searched for acceptance but it's never been that way and it never will be. I'm 17 now, awaiting my 18th. I'm not ready to become an adult, to enter the real world. The stress and reality hits me like a ton of bricks. I'm slowly losing myself in my warped mind. i'm too scared. Help.

Help.

I need help.

The destruction of mind had already begun and there was no one there to save me...who am i kidding? No one will save me. I am no one ~

I tilted my head upwards, glancing at the wide grey clock. It's thick black hands ticking away to a steady rhythm. Counting the seconds until my final breath, It's sad but true. my head managed to turn around to face the mirror, a weak mess stared back. A reflection can only show what someone looks on the outside, i swear im pure. I'm as innocent as a dove. Only time could tell the story, tell the story of what happened all those years back to make me a raven with vicious claws, an unholy thing with a witches curse. A burden to everyone. Even though they don't say it physically i can read their expressions and faces mentally. I'm not wanted. No one wants me. i'm useless. Help. I need help.

Those who ask for my name often turn on me without a second glance, friendship hasn't been something i'd had. No one wants to know me anymore. What would it be like to have someone who cares? what is caring? I think i cared once...i can't remember what that feels like now. I'm just numb.

The pain has made me numb.

she made me numb.

Im just a girl. Asking for nothing more than acceptance, some people view that as easy and don't give a damn about their presence but it isn't until you break enough you soon start to realize the difficulty of everything. My name is Viola. My parents named me Viola, they expected me to do well in the subject of music. Music kills me. The truthful lyrics makes me want to vomit, the memories of HER. i wish they would go away. forever. please. HELP.

I need help~

silent tears stroll down my cheeks, they burn into my skin and leave marks of woe. I wish i knew what the world looked like. i have something called "monochromatic vision" which means i can't see what my parents call "color" The colors i see are black, grey and white. According to the doctors it was really rare and my parents saw it as a downfall for the rest of my life. I love the way the scenery looks. it's pretty. Whilst my siblings noted the colors of Yellow, Orange, red, yellow, blue, green, lilac and indigo. I sat and watched the praises given by my parents and i'd get none. I was simple. easy. Not good enough for them. Not worthy of their praises. I felt...

empty. all i wanted was love. But not her love oh no, NOT HERS everything keeps going back to her. She will never mean anymore to me.

she is dead to me.