Weightless (All Time Low)

So Long Soldier

A.G.

Sleep.

Sleep is a way to take away the pain and suffering, even if it's only for around six to ten hours.

The suffering of life itself, and all of the anxieties that come with this package we are forced to have when we are born.

Eremophobia- Fear of loneliness.

I dread the thought that one day, I may die alone.

How can someone love me?

I'm a mess.

I don't feel attractive, I don't feel like I'm supposed to be here.

I may be a well-off band member, but just because I can act like everything is okay, it really isn't.

I act like I am perfect, I act around everyone but myself.

People think they know me?

How can they know me if I don't even know myself?

I've never planned to kill myself, sure I've thought about what happens, but I will never make a plan for it, there are too many people who care about me; like the fans.

There are simple things that just make me want to go and cry, like when Lisa broke up with me three months ago, or when I had an anxiety attack at Jack's house when Matt told us he was leaving.

I don't like to talk.

Usually what I say isn't important, but I have to, or else the band will start to ask me questions.

If I get questioned, I panic.

When I panic, I fuck up normal things.

Needless to say,

I fuck up a lot.

I'm Alexander William Gaskarth, I go by Alex. I'm 26 years of age, December 14th, 1987 is the date I was born. I like listening to music, touring, being alone, but I also like being around my close friends, and I like singing and playing guitar, if that wasn't clear. I listen to music like Green Day, Blink-182, I like Bring Me The Horizon too, so I like music in the punk/pop-punk genre. I live alone as of now, which does get boring, but it also is nice that I don't have to deal with anyone. I play guitar and I sing in a band called All Time Low. All Time Low not only consists of me, but also consists of my three best friends, Jack Barakat on guitar, Rian Dawson on drums, and Zack Merrick on bass. We're an extremely pop-punk band, and we're sorta popular in the punk/pop-punk genre, not to sound like I'm bragging.

I'm also an only child.

Well, I am now. A while back, my brother Tom, died. It hit me really hard, and I don't really like talking about it. So, I have a rose tattoo on my hand with Tom's initials on it.

"ALEX WAKE THE FUCK UP!" Someone, probably Jack, screams while shoving me. "Jack get the fuck out of my house, and out of my room. I will not hesitate to kick you in the balls." I threaten groggily. "Aw, does my little Lexy have a sexy morning voice?" He says in a very girly voice. I move around and get up to smack him, but just as I got up he ran out of the room. "Jack!" I shout, walking down the stairs. I walk into the kitchen to see Jack, Rian, and Zack all standing around the kitchen counter. "Oh, hi guys." I say awkwardly to them. Zack smiles and nods, Jack smiles widely, and Rian replies with "Hey dude! Long time no see!" I nod at Rian in response, still slightly confused as to why the fuck they're in my house. "We booked a tour..." Zack says. I look over at them questioningly. Jack nods happily as Rian smiles his blinding smile. "With who?" I ask. "With Green Day and some band called Enslave the Empress." Jack replies, smiling even wider. "Another Green Day tour? That's fucking sick!" I exclaim. They all smile, and I cook us up some breakfast.

Here's to another great tour, I'll try and not fuck up this one.