Asylum

How Did I Get Here?

    I turned 14 the day I died. My life crumbled around me and I just... Let go. I felt like I couldn't handle the stress anymore.

    I was wearing my new white dress and silver shoes. My real father had given me a teddy bear when I was 3 and I has it with me that day too.

    I didn't have any friends, so I couldn't have a 'party' but I ate ice cream and got gifts. 

    My mother was a tattoo artist and she gave  me my first tattoo. My stepfather owned a pawn shop and gave me a beautiful arrow. He had called it the Huntress's Arrow.

    My mother was also a murderer. She used the arrow and stabbed my father in the chest like she used a knife to stab my first.

    I ran away that night. The police caught me and interrogated me. When I didn't answer any of their questions, they called my mother and brought me back to my house. I wanted to tell them I couldn't do it. That they shouldn't bring me back to the murderer's house. But I didn't say anything.

    I stayed that way for weeks not eating, not sleeping. Just walking around with my head to the side, clutching my bear. I got sick.

    My mother remaried. Her husband, my new 'father', took notice I my behavior issues. They brought me to a pediatrician. When that didn't work, they brought me to a child's physiatrist, a real one, and finally when they couldn't handle me anymore, a crazy house. Just another word for insane asylum. "We'll come back for you when you get better." They'd said. "We love you." They'd lied.

    I wore that same dress. Those same shoes. Held that same bear. The dress was clean by the time I was admitted, of course. But no one could separate me from the bear.

    I got lead to my room. Metal walls. Hard bunk bed. Door. The last room on my hall of 15 rooms before the bathroom. The gaurd had looked at me strangely when I looked around and sat down on the bed.

    "Aren't you going to put the bear down so we can go meet the other children?" He'd asked, confused. I shook my head slightly. "Okay then... Let's go I guess." He'd said, still frowning.

    He lead me to a big padded room in the basement. There were 28 children here. All of my hall. There were other rooms just like this one. One room for every hall. 3 halls for every floor. 3 floors. There were really 5 floors, but the basement held these rooms that were basically padded gyms. And the first floor held the check in desk, ballrooms, living rooms, and cafeterias. one of each for every hall. 3 halls for every floor. 3 floors.

    The other children were around d my age. From 12 to 16. I guess that's how they decided on which hall on which floor to put you. Some sat in corners, paired. 'Roomates' I thought. Others bounced balls, or colored in pairs. 'Also roommates: I thought.

    I sat im an abandonrd corner with my bear, Emily, and cried until they called due into the cafeteria for supper.

    There was a girl who wouldn't stop laughing or giggling as she stabbed her mill carton with a fork. 

    A girl who stared into space wearing a red bow. 

    A boy with socks on his hands ejo refused to eat.

    Buy no wonder he refused to eat. They served us a carton of mill and a sandwich. The sandwich had slimy ham and greenish cheese. The milk was clumpy.

    After supper, they took us back to our hall. We lined up by the bathroom by order of senorinty. I was last because I was just admitted that day. The bathroom jad stalls and sinks that could fit 4 at a time. The mirrors were merky as I washed my face and drank some of the tap water. It asted funny, but it was probably better than the milk.

    We then were put into our separate rooms. The doors locked from the outside sibthey knew we couldn't get out. I clamboured up to the top bunk and stared at the ceiling thinking 'they said they'd come back. That they love me. They'll come back. They love me.'

    But there was something inside .e that told me they never would.