Small Town Girl (Farkle Minkus)

Chapter Twenty-Three: Girl Meets What Love Feels Like

~~~Farkle~~~

We had been on the train to Austin for three hours. Riley and Maya had gone to another compartment, leaving me, Lucas, Zay and Skipper in ours.  Lucas and Zay sat across from me, Zay asleep and Lucas looking out the window. Skipper was also asleep, her head on my shoulder.

"I can't believe I didn't see it." I looked up to see Lucas, now looking at Skipper. "She's been my best friend since the first grade. How could I not have seen that something was wrong?"

"It's not your fault. She didn't tell anyone." I assured him.

"Did you notice?" He asked. I hesitantly nodded. "I've been so focused on Riley and Maya and girls that...I didn't even notice that something was majorly wrong. None of us did, and that makes us really terrible friends."

"No, you're not. Lucas, you had a lot on your mind. And Skipper's kind of a private person. "

"Yes, but she's constantly putting our problems before hers...and we just sit back and let her. " I didn't have an answer for that one. I looked over at her. Her hair was falling into her face, so I reached up, tucking it behind her ear.

"She told me she loved me."  I glanced up at Lucas's shocked expression.

"When?"

"Our first day here.  She took me out to Fremire Farms."  Recollections flashed in his eyes.

"What did you say?" He asked.

"I told her that I love her too."

"And did you mean it?"  I looked down at her again.

"Yeah...I mean, I think so.  I don't know what love feels like."

"Well...try to describe what you feel to me." He said. I nodded.

"Well...when I look at her...I can't think straight. And...she never ceases to surprise me...in-in a good way. And...I would do anything for her....if she asked me to." He smiled.

"That's love for you."

"Do you love Riley?" I questioned. He sighed.

"Honestly...I have no idea what to feel anymore. I'm so confused and..." He sighed again. "Ok, changing the subject." He leaned forward on his knees, running a hand through his hair. "Farkle, can you promise me something?"

"Sure."

"I want you to promise me that you'll always be there to pay attention when I can't." He looked at her again, and I could tell that he really cares about her...like a sister.

"I promise." He nodded, meeting my eyes again.

"Good."

~~~Skipper~~~

So we were back at school again, and everything was weird. Charlie Gardner was pining after Riley. Lucas and Maya were awkward. Riley and Maya were trying to pretend that everything was ok, and it wasn't. Maya likes Lucas. Riley does too.

"The Hoover Dam on the Arizona/Nevada boarder holds back ten trillion gallons of confused fourteen-year-old feelings that look to smack down the concrete structure of your life and my life,  and It can't take it, and I don't want it, so everybody sit here, and nobody move." Mr. Matthews ranted. "Because as strong as the structural integrity of the Hover Dam might be, just one little, tiny drop of water that makes its way through this barrier will chip away at the structural integrity of our lives as we know them, and the immediate result is the end of my personal happiness. So your assignment is to hold everything back until I die and not let anything through." I watched as Farkle handed Riley a note. Mr. Matthews saw it too.

"Riley? What's that?"

"Nothing." She denied.

"Riley...did something get through?"

"Riley, something happened between me and Lucas." Maya said. She looked between them.

"Oh boy." Riley turned around in her chair.

"Yes Charlie. I will go out with you."

"Ah, crap." I said.

"Hoover Dam." Mr. Matthews added. The bell rang and everyone filed out of the room.

"And how are you?" I looked up at Mr. Matthews. "I know that with everything going on, you might not be getting the attention from your friends that you need." I shook my head.

"I...I think I'm ok, but...this whole situation with Riley, Maya, and Lucas effects all of us. It seemed like, our friendship was one of the only consistant things in my life, and now I'm not so sure if we're even gonna have that. What do I do, Mr. Matthews? How do I fix this?"

"Beleive me, I've been asking myself the same question." He replied, walking around his desk and leaning on the front of it.

"And the answer?" He sighed.

"You can't. The three of them have to figure it out for themselves. I think what you need to do is figure out how you feel."

"About Riley, Lucas, and Maya?" I questioned. He shook his head.

"I know you like to work out other people's problems, and on behalf of my other kids, I thank you. But sooner or later, you're going to have to step back from their problem...and focus on yours. " I bit my lip, nodding.

~~~Farkle~~~

I sat alone, in class, with Mr. Matthews. My name was on the board. He flipped the sign over to show my name.

"Yeah, that's right. I'm callin' Farkle Time. You know why? Because every time it's Farkle time we learn something, and I need to learn somthing. Because you were in Texas, and I wasn't."

"Yes, I was sir."  I replied.

"And would you agree that somethin' happened in Texas that's changing everything?"

"Yes sir."

"Do you know what it is, and do you know how to fix it?"

"No, sir."

"Why not?" He asked.

"Because I'm a scientist, sir. This is all about feelings. Feelings that are new and hard to describe. Look, I'm a genius, but when Skipper looks in my eyes with that beautiful face of hers, or just walks into a room in general,I get a feeling which I can only describe as Bloylahhlahlowww. Also known as: Love. You feel me?"

"Yeah, I feel you, Farkle. Listen. You are Farkle. These people have always been important to you. I need you to figure out what's going on with the three of them and make everything better."

"I'm on it, sir. I like us just the way we are. I don't want anything to change either." I agreed with him.

"Good. Because I have no idea what's gonna happen next."

"I'll do my best sir. But I don't know how to do that, and keep my promise at the same time."

"What promise?" he asked.

"I made a promise toLucas on the train, taht I would always be around to pay attention to Skipper when he couldn't. How do I figure out their problem, and still be there to help Skipper with hers?"

"Now that...that I don't have an answer to." He replied.

"I just...I feel like I'm being pulled in a hundred different directions. On the one hand, I've got my three best friends who need my help figuring this our, and I desperatley want to help.  but on the other hand I have my girlfriend, who's, need I say, much bigger problem is being ignored by all of us. It's like...she's stepping back, and we're just letting her...Oh my gosh."

"What?" He asked.

"I just figured out what's happening with Maya, Lucas, and Riley." I got up, rushing out of the room.