Truth is I'm a mess. Nobody gets it they all seem to run away. I lost everyone. I lost all my friends and my Family.but that's why I'm depressed.i just want to die no body actually honestly knows I want to die other than my guy bestie. But he sometimes thinks I'm joking but I'm absolutely serious about it. I try to ignore it but it's hard I have scars all over my arm because I cut trying to make myself feel better.but then people see it and say it's gross and they leave.idk what to do then.so I keep it hidden like the pain I feel. Hidden behind lies.Behind fake smiles that no one cares to see threw.no body fucking gets it nor do they truly fucking care.im going to be stuck in a loony bin. I'm going to be high on medication shit I don't want to take it won't ever help.im useless and worthless and just a waste of space. He's mad at me yet again...Maybe I should just leave his life so he won't be mad all the time.All I do is fuck up anyways.I'm a fuck up which is why I'm unloved it's why everyone leaves me and why I'm bullied.Im just going to
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disappear from everyone's life then they will be happy and wont have to deal with me.im sorry Matthew I really am.i guess this is good night......
