"An order for Samantha!" I walked up to the counter of Starbucks. Smiling, I say, "Every time Lammy?"
"Don't call me Lammy," he says bluntly.
"Don't call me Samantha," I reply with the same tone. Lamaur is my best friend, but seriously every day he refuses to call me Sam. I return the favor with calling him Lammy.
"Anyways, have you found yourself a new girlfriend in this coffee shop?" Lamaur questions. I roll my eyes.
"You sterotypical son of a bitch. That doesn't happen in real life. Besides, I'm too socially awkward to actually go up to a girl and ask for a number, flirt, etc.." I say the last part softly.
"Well, I suppose-" Lamaur was cut off by an elderly lady.
"You two love birds done with flirting? I need my coffee," she says with a sweet, fake smile. I turn around, knowing I should be polite but not really caring. I was gunna scare the old lady right out of her tracksuit.
"Well, I'm actually a lesbian. A gaybie. That's a new vocab term for you! Anyways, this is my best friend, and we're actually talking about me not being able to get a girlfriend. Wait a minute, since you interrupted us, Do you want to go out some time?" I say quickly. I know she understood me because she looked terrified. Lamaur is laughing so hard he's snorting, but I don't see what's so funny. She gets all flustered and walks away... without the coffee.
"Hell hath no fury like Samantha," he says through the laughing. Damn straight, Lammy. Damn straight.
"Anyways, I have this friend, I think you'll like her-" Lamaur starts, but I cut him off. No more trying to set me up with his random friends.
"I'm not letting this happen again. Nope. No way, just tell me about your girlfriend," I say in choppy pieces of a sentence. Last time he set me up with his friend, it turned out she had a boyfriend and was straight, claiming to be gay.
"Ouch. Damn. You heartless bitch you know I don't have a girlfriend for reasons. Why you so salty?" He almost screams. Lamaur turns away frustrated. Isn't he supposed to be working anyways? I start laughing.
"What's the matter Lammy? No one willing to date a virgin?" I tease him about that a lot, although I shouldn't because ever time I say that this happens:
"It's my choice! Now get out of here before i start swinging!" I started running away laughing when I ran into the glass door and spilled coffee all over me. Everything turns to silence and people stare. A girl runs over and starts taking off my backpack. I didn't understand why until I remembered my homework and laptop.
"Thanks, chica," I say. When i don't know someones name, Chica seems appropriate. For some random reason she starts laughing.
"It's Ace," she says sweetly.
"What are you, a drug dealer? What kind of name is that?" I say laughing. I was cracking up at my own jokes in front of a cute girl.
"What's it to you unless you're buying from me?" she whispers in my ear. She starts laughing, gets up, and leaves, leaving me in a puddle of coffee. Everyone turned back to their conversations long ago. As she walks out I turn around and look at Lamaur, who's standing there just shocked. I walked over knowing I was gunna get an earful next.
"You said those things don't happen in real life! Sam!" Lamaur exclaimed.
