Talking to the moon [Tsukkiyama]

1

They say I'm the moon and you're the star. But you know what? The moon is very lonely without its star...

I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back

I should've protected you, I shouldn't let you go, but I did and it was the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. Every day I woke up, finding the place where we used to lie and cuddle is now cold and empty. I want you back by my side again, I want you back so badly. I just can't live without you anymore. But it's far too late now cause I've lost you for good now.

My neighbors think I'm crazy
But they don't understand
You're all I had
You're all I had

I'm a jerk, a useless guy that doesn't know how to appreciate all the good things that ever happened to me until it's just far too late. The day when you're gone, I cried, I screamed. They all think that I'm crazy, they all think that I should see the doctor. They just don't understand, they understand nothing at all. They don't know how is it like to lose the person you loved the most. All the pain and regrets are just drowning me, strangling me alive. People out there say I'm a successful volleyball player that has everything. But in reality, I don't.  Success, fame, money... I don't need any of these. All I had was you and yet, I lost you. I couldn't protect the only thing I had, I'm truly a loser.

At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself talking to the moon

Every night, I sat on the chair that you once loved on our balcony, staring at the night sky. It used to be painted with stars, a sky full of it but now it's gone, all gone. Just like how that you're now gone. The only thing left in that dark, empty sky is the moon. Alone by itself in that big landscape all night, alone just like me. I sit there, close my eyes, imagine that you're still right beside me like you always did. The times when you were listening to me when I tell you how my matches went, and your beautiful smile. I will never forget how you slightly blush when you smile that painted your freckles pretty pink.

Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?

They say that when good people leave the world, they'll become one of the shining stars in the sky. I used to think it's pathetic, but now I'm always looking at the brightest star. Sometimes I wonder if you heard my words or not...

I'm feeling like I'm famous
The talk of the town
They say I've gone mad
Yeah, I've gone mad

When some people saw me on the streets some will say

"Oh it's that guy! Be careful, I heard he's gone mad. Someone said that he cries and screams every night. And he even talks to himself and laughs sometimes like some mad people!"

They all think that I'm crazy, well whatever, why should I even care?

But they don't know what I know
Cause when the sun goes down
Someone's talking back
Yeah, they're talking back

Sometimes I heard voices, at first, I thought that I really had gone mad but then those voices sounded just like you. Maybe, just maybe that it's really you...

At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself talking to the moon.
Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?

Do you ever hear me calling?

I'm not blaming you for leaving me, no, not even once. It is my fault after all for not being able to protect you. It's all my fault, I'm not as capable as I once thought I was. I'm always wondering why did you choose me, why me? There's a whole lot of people out there, better than me that can take care of you better than I do. So why me?

"Cause I love you, and only you that can make me feel so special."

You told me this whenever I looked down on my own self.

I just hope my words, the words that I didn't manage to say to you when you're here, will get to you cause every night, I'm talking to the moon...

Still trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?

They told me to give up, everything was just a myth. All the things I heard were all illusions. If my past self saw myself right now, he'll surely laugh at me for believing all these useless things. Yes, it is pathetic but this is all I can do now. I'm still trying to get to you, I want to see you again, I want you back. And you know what?

I love you too
Always and forever, Tadashi.

I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away

"Gomen, Tsukki..."

FIN

I made myself sad ;_;
I'm sorry cause this is lame :/
And also my first try for Tsukkiyama angst *stabs myself with a knife*