The Outsiders

More Grave Than We Thought

My ears rang with the muffled sounds of the aftermath of this horrific attack. I was walking blind with the image of Kayleigh and Callum's faces, void of life and emotion, engrained into the surface of my vision. I could feel my body moving through the motions, driving through the flesh of those in my way, but couldn't register my surroundings, at least not fully.

The muffled sounds of my friends' concern fluttered through my ears as the
screams of the lost overpowered them. I flinched as Jemma's hand made contact with my shoulder, it was, what I'm sure was meant to be a somewhat comforting gesture. She retracted her hand as if she had made contact with a stove top.

'Lauren, please I need you to snap out of what ever guilt you feel. We'll grieve the others later, please magpie thinking like this will get you killed!' Her face held such worry and also a hint of exasperation. I took a deep intake of breath, blinked back my guilt driven tears and gained back what little courage I could. My mind was racing at such a pace that all I could comprehend was nonsense: fault, death, puppets, no, please, not enough, failure, stop, your fault, stop it!

My head swung to the side, a prickling sting radiating through my cheek.

'Lauren! Snap the fuck out of it!' Ellie bit out in frustration, her body twisted from the force of her slap. My hand automatically swung up to cradle my blood swelled cheek and my restless eyes finally stilled on her unapologetic form. Silence fell over the group as everyone processed what Ellie had done.

'Ouch' My voice dropped into monotone as I prevented my gruelling emotions from daring to enter my mind. My eyes scanned over the area taking in every single insignificant detail: the paint was cracked, tinted from its original tone- 5 maybe 10 years old, scuffs from the army's cheap leather boots littered the floor, thinner, deeper scrapes evidence of the transport of something of a heavier weight on wheels- logic assumes weapons of some kind, slight smell of nitric acid so an explosive of some kind, strength of smell shows it was large in size. Then why, why were they so unprepared for the attack? Unless...

'Lewis! You've been part of the army for what a year? Did they ever mention any kind of transportation of weapons, anything at all?'

'What? I...I...' My patience was beginning to run thin. I groaned running my hands through my hair.

'Think Lewis, now! Lives are at stake!' This was the point where Ivy butted into the conversation.

'Lauren! He's trying back off! This isn't a time for mind games!' Her voice was raised as her frustration climbed.

'Don't you see Ivy! Are you all really that unobservant! This goes way beyond just us, this goes beyond the lives we've led! Every soul in this whole institute is at risk, so forgive me if I don't take your boyfriend's feelings into account!' Ivy stepped back in shock, her hands forming into fists. I had made her angry.

'Look Ivy, look at the floors! I know you see it, you all do but you don't observe! The markings something of great weight was brought north of the hall towards the centre of the institute, rather than south towards the exits! Where did they come from? The south! They moved something away from defence! Why? Why put us in even more danger than before?! They needed something to happen but what? Can't you smell it?! Obvious scent of explosives, why move their biggest defence, unless a new plan was evolved! Let them think they have the upper hand, they get cocky and reckless! Until...?' Ivy and Ellie's eyes lit up in realisation and the former finished my thoughts.

'They go for the weak. The explosives take them out and...the weak get wiped out with them. How could they even consider committing mass homocide.' Ivy's face held nothing but disgust until she shifted her gaze onto Lewis.

'Please tell me you knew nothing of this!' His expression was one of utter shock.

'Of course I didn't fucking know Ivy! How could you think that?'

'I know, I'm sorry. I love you...' She trailed off to a whisper as the two hugged and exchanged a few hushed words. Ellie and Jemma stepped towards me with concern once again gracing their young but stress worn faces.

'Lauren you need to slow down mate. You can't handle all the stress. Do you remember the French incident? Now that was a bad move!' Ellie has an unbelievable talent for finding/ making humour in all situations, to the point where none of us were surprised by her comments anymore.

'Stop shutting your feelings off, you are not a machine! Please you're my best friend magpie and it hurts to see you like this.' Jemma's face held such hurt that I couldn't even bear to look at her in fear of breaking down.

'Really? Weren't you the ones that were telling me to 'snap out' of my thoughts? If it wasn't for me we'd still be under the belief that the 'higher ups' gave a shit about us!' My voice had grown several octaves and my hands had found their way to the handles of my babies. The two of them stepped back hands extended outward in a sign of peace. As my own hands retracted from their most comfortable position, I heard movement occurring to our right.

'Guys we've got to move. NOW!' And we did. Our weapons were drawn and rearing to go. I feel sorry for the poor bastard that got in our way.