[My Resolution]
Dear Me,
In the past all we've done is make empty promises that get lost in our train of thought. Even now, i think that i'm going to forget ever writing this letter. Sadly, that's the truth.
But, i don't want to make a promise, i don't want to wish on a star, i don't want to hope that all my dreams will just come true instantly. Because...we both know that's not true. We both know that even though we try as hard as we can, we don't actually work for it.
So...
"Muna! You need to sleep!" My mom calls me.
"I'm coming! I just need to finish something up!" I tell her
She sighs and goes back to her bedroom.
I stare down at my messy handwriting, i'm just a big mess.
Every year, i always want to do something amazing. I wanna do big things! But, i never go along with my plans. I always trick myself into thinking i can't do it, or i just become stuck. I already have 27 drafts on wattpad. And i have such big plans for all my writing, and my graphics.
I remember last year when i wanted to make a blog. I published it, but i took it down after seeing other blogs because i lost confidence...
Confidence...
What a trivial thing.
I've always questioned things. Why people do the things they do, why we have relationships, why people can be so...evil.
I remembered long time ago when i thought that the world was an ugly place that had nothing but disgusting people who want to fight and create problems. I still think that there are people like that.
But it's because they don't want to change...
They don't want to understand, they don't want to see things in another perspective. They just want to be right.
That's all it is.
Sometimes, i wonder. Why people do the things they do, why they act how they act, why can't they just join hands and become friends?
That's one of the reasons i love wattpad. Because mostly, it's because it's a bunch of creative people! With dreams, and ideas. My favorite part is that it doesn't matter if you're half way across the world or maybe a few miles from your house, you can all be connected. Be friends...
I pick up the pen that i left on the kitchen table, and begin to write again.
So, this year, my resolution is to be happy with what i have. Work towards my goals, finish at least one story, and become friends with more people around the world through wattpad.
Dear Future Me, i wish you the best in your studies and your life, because no matter what horrible things you think of yourself, you can keep moving forward with the best of your abilities, because...
Your name is Amani. Amani means wishes, and hope. 'Be the change you want to see in the world' right? So change, and help others see things through your lends this year and hopefully in the years to come...
From, the looking glass self
P.S. Happy New Year.
