Whispers of a Killer

Blue lights

After the 'incident' in the kitchen, I was left to sleep outside. I believe his exact words to me were something along the lines of "if he didn't kill me, then surely something out here would." So far, nothing has. I've been rained on and am freezing, though I can't say that I think a little rain is going to kill me.

To make sure that I don't go anywhere, my left wrist has been tied to one of the porch posts with his belt. Why Jeff still hasn't killed me, I don't know. I don't get it. He leaves to go out killing more now than he used to - this is what happens every time he gets this mad at me. He comes back all bloody, and doesn't even bother to look at me most of the time. By my count, I think he's left me out here for at least four days.

And I think I'm starting to see things.

Around midnight, the night before last; I started to see these odd, glowing blue lights. They floated around, free and almost as if they were flying. Almost like..butterflies. When they came closer, they looked more like these mythological creatures that I heard of once, which I believe were called 'will-o'-the-wisps, ' or something like that.  I think they were in one of the books I used to read, one of the ones about mythological creatures.

Which is why I know what else they're called. 'Fool's fire,' 'ghost-lights,' and even 'orbs,' by some paranormal investigators and enthusiasts. That's important to me, because in knowing that I thought I was crazy for sure.

That is... until I saw her, as well.

~

I was shifting in my spot again, trying to get comfortable. I was dosing off, stuck in that place between sleep and being awake, when I first saw her appear.

She had short, choppily cut black hair. She was thin, paler than anything, and seemed to glow. I could almost see right through her; and felt immediate dread when she came closer. Not of her, but something or someone else. It was almost as if she was afraid and I could feel the fear coming off of her.   

At the same time, I felt so calm. Almost like I was entranced, even. I couldn't see her eyes, though I felt like she was looking at mine. Staring straight into my soul, from wherever she came from. From what I could see, she was covered in cuts, bruises, and blood. And yet, she didn't seem to want to hurt me. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure that she was the victim of some kind of violent crime herself, rather than someone who wanted to commit one.

She hovered there, not too far from me. Slowly reaching out to me through the rain.

At the time, I didn't know her name. I didn't know who she was or where she had even appeared from. I felt like I have known her for forever. Like I've felt her presence before, somehow. She reached for me, her hand slowly moving to touch the side of my face. What I felt was like a cold air, chilling my cheek almost completely to the bone. Her other hand reached for the belt that still bound my wrist to the porch,  and slowly undid the tie; though seemingly without having any need to actually make contact with the thing.

When the belt came off my wrist, I could finally feel it again. There was a red mark left on my skin from where the belt was for so long, and it felt raw almost. There's still faint scratches on my arm around my wrist from where I kept scratching at it. 

After letting me loose, she led me to the door, causing it to open with whatever ethereal ability that she had to do so. I wasn't sure that I wanted to, though being so cold and still wet from the rain, I let her beckon me inside the cabin again.

~

Not long after I've came back inside and allowed the other girl to take care of me, I hear a very familiar, very irritated voice.

"Who the hell said you could come back inside?...And how the hell did you even get back in?!"

I don't mean to agitate an already bad situation, so I simply nod in the other girl's direction. "She did." I still don't know her name, otherwise I would have addressed her better than always calling her 'she' or 'her.' It's not until I nod towards her that Jeff seems to notice her standing..well, floating, there. His expression turns to more of a smirk, and he folds his arms.

"Oh she did, did she?" he asks, tilting his head and raising an eyebrow. "Well then. I haven't seen you in a long time..Jenny. It's nice to see you're still all soft hearted.." I sense sarcasm in his voice, and halfway expect him to add 'not,' a few seconds later. Though he doesn't.

He just comes closer to her, causing a deep red color to cover her pale face. I don't know why I bother to pay any attention, but something about this irks me. Maybe it's because he's done so much hitting on me, and been so persistent about it, but he is now paying attention to some other girl. Even if it was unwanted attention, it just reminds me of the story of my life so far - save for the me actually getting any attention part. Any time I ever like anyone, it's always some other girl who gets their attention. Almost always in front of me, too.

Not that I like Jeff. Because, I don't. He's an asshole. Though that's not the point.

The point right now, is that I'm too tired and too cold and miserable to put up with watching them make out. Jenny seems embarrassed about it, though of course; I know Jeff doesn't care. Which figures.

With my soup finished, I decide to slink away to the living room to play with the dogs. The puppies have been getting so big, though still think they're small enough to sit on my head. Courage has been more protective of them and of me than usual, and I have a sneaking suspicion that she might be pregnant again. This time, I'm sure I'll know who the father is - there's only one culprit this time around, if she is actually pregnant again. 

She seems to still like belly rubs, though.

"Are you pwegnant again? Huh, are ya pweggie Courage?" I ask, allowing myself to let the softest of laughs under my breath, as I run my fingers through the soft fur on her underbelly.

Courage begins to wag her tail, and lick my hand. She doesn't seem to mind my silly baby talk towards her; I wish I could ignore the sounds from the kitchen as well.

I can't help but to remember my statement to Jeff the night before he locked me outside on the porch. Telling him to leave me alone and find someone else to grope. Essentially I was rejecting every advance that he was making; telling him not to make any more, and to ignore me or leave me alone. What I want is hardly ever listened to. I never get what I want. I should be elated that he's found someone else to bother.

Although.. for some reason, all I feel is sour..like I didn't actually want what I was asking for.

...Almost..as if I'm not even happy I got it.

And I can't help but wonder, even if only for a few seconds...

Am I?