The Three Murderteers

One Dead Body

"There are 7 billion people on this earth Taran, 7 billon. You are so overreacting just because we killed one single man. One man. Honestly."
"But-"
"No buts, 7 billion people. Now stop complaining and and drink your veggie shake."
"What if-"
"7 billion."
"Someone could find o-"
"You're being dramatic."
"But-"
"We just went over this Taran, no buts."
"Whatarewegonnadowiththebodythough?" Taran frantically gushed out, not drawing a breath between words so Ramen didn't have the opportunity to interrupt her again.
"That..." Ramen paused, considering Taran's question. "Is actually a great question sis." Ramen glanced at their third partner in crime: Marv, Ramen and Taran's brother, who happened to be younger than Ramen by exactly 3 minutes and 27 seconds and older than Taran by 3 and 1/4 years.

"We probably should have accounted for that earlier before we, you know." Marv motioned to the dead body still sprawled out between their feet.
"Before we murdered that monster?" Ramen finished the sentence for Marv dryly. "Still got it." Ramen whispered loudly, fist pumping indiscreetly and mentally congratulating himself on his capability to finish any sentence Marv ever began. Marv and Ramen's twinklingly mishtiveous eyes met, and their ongoing childhood joke started up once again even amid the murder scene.
"Still got what bro?" Marv asked knowingly, the words so familiar to him they could practically be his name.
"Oh you know," Ramen started.
"A psychic twin connection?!" They both shouted in unison. They chest bumped over the dead body and their sister face palmed at their idioticy.
"Guys. Murder. Dead body. Back to the problem." Taran hissed, completely ruining the brotherly moment. The boys groaned simultaneously.
"Just drink your veggie shake, this is a man's problem." Ramen bragged, puffing out his chest.
"Yeah man's job." Marv echoed.
"Well you two better find a man to do the job pretty soon because the cops will be arriving sooner or later. I'm sure the neighbors heard our gunshots. The twins gasped dramatically in offense.
"Are you implying," Marv started.
"That we aren't real men?" Ramen finished.
"But sis,"
"We just killer a man for you."
"I NEVER ASKED YOU TO KILL HIM STUPID!" Taran suddenly exploded, the flood of panicked emotions she had been subduing, finally bursting out of her control.
"Woah, woah, woah... calm down little sis."
"Why do you two idiots always go messing around with my life?" Taran wailed, completely hysterical. "Why do you take everything so personally? Why can't you just attend a university or something, like normal brothers?
"We don't take things to personality!" Ramen huffed defensively.
"You just shot a man, in the head because he... he... well you know." Taran couldn't finish her sentence, tears pricked in her eyes and Marv crossed over the dead man to embrace Taran in a comforting hug.
"Because he was the jerkface who broke my little sisters heart?" Ramen ranted, lividly finishing Taran's sentence. Marv patted Taran's tangled hair in a soothing way. "Because the... the, the foul minded son of a venomous camel, abused my little sister." Taran sniffed, regaining control of her emotions, and pushed Marv away, her hysterics calming just as suddenly as they had begun. Marv watched her, with a worried expression clouding his face. Ramen however was oblivious and had begun aggressively kicking the lifeless body, while softly cursing under his breath.
For a brief moment, Taran realized just how extreme and absurd her family was. Maybe they were all crazy. Was her family mental? Did inanity course through their blood? Suddenly, she waved the thought away, not wanting to ponder it at the moment, she dragged herself back to reality.
"So what're we doing with, ya know... the body?" Marv asked, gazing curiously at the familiar dead man.
"We could burry him in the back yard right near that huge pile of dirt from the new pool he was assembling." Ramen suggested.
"Good plan, that way the dirt is already freshly dug and our traces will be left unnoticed." Marv agreed. Taran just sighed and anxiously slurped her veggie shake.
The boys, dragged the body out back and began to dig a grave, leaving Taran to bitterly order their get away tickets.
It took the boys just under three hours to dig a hold big enough to stuff the hated carcass into. By the time they finished Taran had successfully printed off three first class train tickets to Chicago, where they would lay low for a couple months, before all murder suspects had been cleared.
The boys trudged in, cloaked in sweat and mud. They smelt wretched and Taran, who was somehow unshakingly calm, ordered them into showers. She went to collect each of them some spare clothes from her ex's- the dead man buried out back- old wardrobe. She figured he wouldn't mind, the deceased didn't really have need for spare clothes afterall. Taran could hear one of her idiot brothers yodeling in the shower and she smiled. She really did love her brothers, yes, they could be a bit extreme and over-protective at times, but they held her together and they forced her to enjoy life. They had been there for her when Trevor- his name still caused her to get chills, he terrified her, not anymore though- when Trevor had... had first assaulted her. The first time she had stumbled through the front door into their apartment with a red, puffy hand mark covering her cheek, Marv had hugged her, and refused to release Taran until she had confessed why she was in tears and who had hit her- in fact, even after she had cried her tears dry, he still hadn't released her. Of course, on that dreadful night, Ramen didn't help in the slightest with his pacing and infuriated yells echoing across their small living space, but still, Ramen's angry death threats and Marv's unshakable comfort showed they cared. Taran hadn't realized it at the time, but her brothers had probably saved her from committing something terrible that night. Who knew what she might have done to numb her breaking heart?

Ramen's yodeling suddenly broke through Taran's solem thoughts and Taran headed towards the bathroom Ramen was occupying to drop off his change of clothes first.
"Like baby, baby, baby NOO." Ramen squealed out, Taran smiled a quirky little smile, forgetting the recent murder for a moment as she listens to her brat of a brother stubbornly singing out the wrong lyrics to that one Justin Bieber song. Taran paused a moment, listening to him embarrass himself and solely wishing she had video camera. Eventually, realizing they would need to leave for the train station soon, Taran pounded the bathroom door, hollered at Ramen to hurry up, and set the new change of clothes right outside the bathroom door. She did the same thing for Marv, thankfully without having to yell at him over his absurd singing. Soon the three met up in the living room, and just kinda stared at each other for a moment, not quite yet comprehending that they had all assisted in murdering a man. Not quite realizing that there life might never be the same. Not quite fully understanding how drastic their situation could become if any of them were ever caught. A mixture of emotions played out on each's face, like an old timey, black and white film. Marv's face appeared troubled, almost aged. There was the faintest hint of defiance, confidence... almost accomplishment tucked behind Marv's grey eyes. He felt dirty, his hands, although squeaky clean, would forever be blood stained, but Marv would never regret shooting Trevor. No one messed with Marv's family and got away with it. He was proud to have protected his sister. Trevor could never hurt Taran again.
Ramen's face was fully contorted in a beaming pride. Unlike the almost accomplishment Marv secretly felt, Ramen was fully confident he did the right think. Murder might be drastic, but no one could ever hurt his baby sister and live. She was to fragile and perfect for this cruel world, and if anyone ever tried to hurt her again Ramen wouldn't even hesitate to shoot them square between the eyes.
Unlike her brothers, Taran only felt fear. Between the three of them, she understood their situation in the deepest way. Her emotions were a mess and constantly changing. She wanted to be strong for her brothers so badly. Part of her wanted to have been the one to pull the trigger on Trevor. Part of her was overflowing in gratefulness. She didn't know what she did to deserve such protective and loving brothers, but she was so greatful for them. Yet another part of Taran just wanted to sob. She was so scared. She was mostly terrified they would be caught, but a large part of her also held an unquietable fear of Trevor. Even though she knew Trevor could never touch her again, she had been cowering from him for what seemed like ages now, and it would be truly years until she could finally overcome her subconscious fear of Trevor. Most of all, although fear pressed down upon Taran like the weight of the world, and despite her misplaced calmness from earlier, Taran just wanted to ignore all the little voices and fears nagging at her. What Taran really needed was another veggie shake and a solid 48 hour nap.
"So," Marv suddenly spoke, "I guess we have a train to catch." An awkward and solemn silence filled the air.
"Yeah." Ramen finally agreed.
"Yeah." Taran echoed.
With that established, they headed out the door, Taran leading the way, and her brothers loyally following and guarding her all the way to their shared car. Once they had all piled in, the mood lifted. It had partly lifted because Ramen and Marv had engaged in a good-natured fist fight over who had the first dibs on the shotgun seat, and it partly lifted because Taran ended up slyly stealing the passenger seat while they were arguing. And just like that, their life seemed to snap right back to it's previous comical siblingship routine. Taran and Marv ended up screaming out karaoke songs all the way to the train station, while Ramen sulked in the back seat.
When they finally arrived, time seemed to speed up, and before they knew it all three of them we're playing Go Fish with Marv's collectible baseball cards in a train cabin. The two day ride to Chicago passed quickly and before they knew it they were all arguing about what color to paint their new Chicagoan apartment. Life
passed merrily in their household. It wasn't until they had lived two weeks in their new home, that a suspect list for a young male adult named Trevor, the mysterious boy found dead, buried in his own backyard, was broadcasted over the news. None of them were on the suspect list, and eventually after the killers were never found, Trevor's case was dropped. They were free to return home, however, much to their surprise, the siblings discovered none of them actually wanted to return. Taran had too many painful memories tucked away in their old hometown, Ramen had already found a sweet girl to flirt with in Chicago, and Marv had immediately landed a sweet role as the lead detective on a rising in popularity new reality TV show- it was pretty ironic. Over all, they all three loved living in Chicago, moreover they loved having a fresh start at life. Occasionally when feeling sentimental or worried, on of their trio would bring up Trevor or their old lives, but when that would happen Ramen would always distract the others with the touchy, but comical nickname he had made up for them a few months back: The Three Murderteers.