Zoey sighed as she laid back on her bed.
"That was horrible." She groaned. I smiled and sat down on the edge of her bed. She looked up at me.
"It wasn't too terribly bad." I reassured her. She sighed and bit her lip. "What's wrong, Zoey?"
"Well, Nyx. She told me something. When I had died." She said. I stared at her, shocked.
"What'd she say?" I asked. She looked away. I felt that she was unsure and embarrassed.
"Nothing. Never mind." She said quickly. I took her face in my hands.
"You can tell me, Zoey." I whispered. She turned away from me, pain jolting through her. "Zoey, I have no reason to lie to you anymore." Not that I had ever lied in the first place. She sighed and shook her head. I knew it was wrong. I shouldn't do this. But there were a lot of things that I shouldn't do that I did anyways.
I pushed her back against the bed and hovered over her.
"We can do this the easy way," I whispered. I lowered my lips to her, just barely brushing them against hers. "Or the hard way. You're pick." I felt shock and disbelief, and I grinned.
"Yes. Yes I would." I answered her question that had formed in her head. She just stared at me, frozen. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. I smiled and pressed my lips against hers. She didn't move, but I felt her want. I looked down at her.
"What did she say?" I asked. She turned her head away, scowling. I kissed her neck and she tensed.
"You're such an ass." She whispered. I chuckled and kissed along her jaw. She sighed.
"Fine. She said something about you not lying in the first place. I wanted to know what she meant." She said. I froze. That was all? I just stared at her.
"Well? Are you gonna get off me? Cause that's a rip off if your not." She said. I laughed softly and slowly got off of her. U laid down next to her and grinned. She looked scared then and I laughed as I wrapped my arm around her, pulling her closer to me.
"Loren. Stop." She sighed. I looked at her and shook my head.
"I'm sorry, Zoey." I whispered. I pressed my lips to hers once more. "Please forgive me." She didn't kiss me back, but she didn't pull away.
"I... I still get to ask one question." She breathed. I pulled away and gave her a sad smile. She bit her lip. "Did you... did you love me?" I just barely made the words out but when I did, I smiled.
"No. Because I normally sleep with people I don't love." I said sarcastically.
"So you also love Neferet?" She asked. I grimaced.
"I did. Before she went all psycho crazy." I said.
"Bitch whore." I looked at her, confused. "Psycho crazy bitch whore." I laughed softly and nodded.
"And... yes." I said. It was her turn to be confused. "I love you, Zoey." She blushed and looked away.
"Loren..." she shook her head. "I can't... I fell for you. I loved you, but..." She looked back at me, tears in her eyes. "You used me. No matter how you feel now or how sorry you are, you still used me." She caressed my cheek, a deep sadness in her eyes. "I love Stark. He's my soul mate. He's my everything. But I love Kalona. I was made for him. I can't help but to feel these things for him..." She trailed off. She took a deep breath. "I still love you. If I didn't, you wouldn't be able to hurt me this much." I winced. "I... I forgive you, Loren. And I love you. But I can't be with you. No matter how much I want to." A single tear fell and she quickly turned away from me.
"I need to sleep. I'm tired and the sun will be up soon. I'd rather not burn to a crisp. 'Night." She said. I turned the light off.
"Do you mind?" I asked, reaching to wrap my arm around her. She was silent for a moment. She took my hand and wrapped my arm around her.
"Nothing more." She said, her voice voice of any emotion. I could feel her sadness, her hurt, her desperation. I understood why she was doing this, but that didn't make it hurt any less. I loved her. I wanted her. I needed her. And, suddenly, that need started boiling over.
"Zoey?" I whispered. She turned to me. She studied me. I'm sure she could feel my emotions through the bond. She bit my lip, and shook her head.
"We can't do this, Loren. Please." She whispered. She took my face in her hands. "Control yourself. It's a bitch. But you can." I shook my head.
"I don't want to." I breathed. I pulled her to me, kissing her with everything I had. She tried to push me away but suddenly stopped. She kissed me back. I didn't care that the kiss screamed goodbye. I didn't care that this was the last time I would kiss her, hold her. I didn't care that she was breaking my heart. I didn't care about any of those things. I needed her, and I needed her now.
I hovered over her, running my hands all over her body. She moaned and arched her back. She suddenly pulled away.
"This is the last time, Loren." She said. I nodded. "Why are you doing this when you know it's just going to hurt you even more?" I kissed her again.
"Because I love you." I whispered against her lips.
Zoey pulled the covers over us and snuggled into my chest. She looked up at me.
"I'm sorry." She said. I tightened my arms around her, pulling her as close to me as possible.
"There's nothing to be sorry for." I murmured. She looked at the window, the curtains covering most of them. There was a small opening in them, letting in the little bit of sunlight there was outside. She sighed heavily and closed her eyes.
"I love you." I said, smiling down at her. She smiled sadly.
"I know." She said.
"So where do we stand?" I asked. She slowly opened her eyes.
"Confused." She said.
"If you love me, then why can't you be with me?" I found myself asking. She smiled.
"I think I'm rubbing off on you." She said. I knew what she meant, but I didn't smile. She groaned softly.
"Look, I don't know, okay? I love Stark, Heath, Kalona, and you. Loren, I'm confused as hell. Why in the world are you asking me that?" She asked, looking at me like I grew two heads. I laughed, and rolled us over so that I was on top of her.
"I think I can clear a few things up." I said before I kissed her again. She moaned but pulled away.
"I need to sleep." She said with a small smile. I kissed her again. I didn't want to let her go. I couldn't let her go. I loved her too much to see her with anyone else. She winced.
"I'm sorry, Loren. I truly am." She said. "But we. Can't. Do. This." Her voice was firm and confirming. I sighed and got off of her... somewhat.
"You don't have to let me go, Loren. It's more like..." She trailed off, looking for the words. "We're on hiatus, okay?" I smiled sadly and nodded. She went to pull away but I tightened my arms around her.
"You said I didn't have to let you go. So I'm not letting go. At least not tonight." I said. She laid her head on my chest and fell asleep as I gently trailed my fingers up and down her back.
"I love you... so much, Zoey." I whispered before I drifted off to sleep.
Sorry for the short chapter,guys! I love you all💖🙊
