From Tragedy To Fantasy

Chapter 1.

I feel like i'm taking the walk of shame as I approach the dooming double doors of the church. The black outfits and tear stained faces all make their way in, ahead of me. As I make my way through the pews, I approach with the Salters; Zoey's parents. I don't feel worthy enough to look them in the eyes. No apology I can offer, will ever bring back their beautiful daughter. "I'm so, so sorry Jen," I choke out, but Zoey's mum only bursts into tears, and uses Mark's hands to shelter her. "I really am," I practically whisper as I start to turn away. "Leah, don't beat yourself up over this. It was an accident." I hear Zoey's dad say to me, causing me to freeze in my tracks. I offer the best version of a smile that I possibly can before I turn away. How can he tell me everything's alright, when I was driving in the accident that resulted in their daughter's death?

 

"What happened? Somebody tell me what's happened!" Mark's demands could be heard from miles away. The screaming cries of Jen broke my heart even more so. The blue and red lights swam around my eyes, and the only comfort I would receive tonight, was the small blanket that the paramedics had placed over my shoulders, as I sat dead still, hidden in the corner of the scene that was becoming my nightmare. 

 

I shake my head, trying to erase the scenes of that night, three days ago, that played out in my mind. I couldn't offer anyone any answers. I felt useless. I remember the day at the boutique, the moment we hopped into the car, and then nothing. Absolutely nothing until the aftermath. 

I feel a warm hand grip mine besides me, and I look up to find the comforting smile of my mother, and the reassuring support of my father sitting next to me. "It'll be alright Leah, shhh, it'll be alright," my mother's soothing voice whispers into my ears as I sniffle a silent sob and try to wipe the tears from my eyes. 

The organ begins to play and the coffin is carried to the front of the church, surrounded in a city of candles, flowers and pictures. Pure memories is all that is left.

*~*~*

"And you're sure you don't want to stay for at least a few nights? Just as recovery Leah?" My mother's worried eyes plead with my own.

"I'll be fine mum, don't worry about me, i'll call if I need anything."

"Promise me you will."

"I promise mum. Love you," I say and kiss my mum's cheek. Dad gives me a warm hug before they both exit the church. I brush down the creases in my black dress and make my way to the double doors, hoping for some coffee and some fresh air.

"Leah? Leah Jones is that you?" I spin around on my heels and face the one person that allows me to have a genuine smile in days.

"Harry. Oh my god, Harry!" I gasp and run into his arms. "How have you been?" I ask him. I then realise that's probably the most stupidest question to ask, while standing in the church of our friend's funeral. "Sorry, stupid question, but you know.."

"Yeah I know what you mean. Besides all this," he says, gesturing to where we are, "I've been pretty okay."

"Gosh, we need to catch up, I haven't seen you in forever," I say as I think back to the last time I had seen my high school best friend, alongside Zoey, smiling together at graduation. Suddenly, I don't feel so chirpy anymore.

"Well hey, i'm not doing anything this afternoon, how about we go and catch up?"

"Coffee at four, the usual?" 

"I'll see you there Leah," Harry smiles and gives me one last hug goodbye. 

As I finally walk through the church doors, I spot Jen, from the corner of my eye, shaking her head at me in. Maybe I don't deserve the happiness of seeing Harry. Maybe I shouldn't be allowed to smile at all.