Helpless (Lams AU)

Chapter Eight: What Love Is

TW: SUICIDE ATTEMPT
Hercules P.O.V.
"Mon amour, I'm worried," Laf said, holding my face, "What if you get sad and need a hug?" I gently removed his hands from my face, putting them on my waist.

"I'm sure there will be plenty of people there to hug me, babe," I laughed, planting a quick kiss on his sweaty forehead. He was crying. My poor baby. I was gonna miss him, but this was my dream. Laf was just my dream man.

"I'm still worried," He said tearfully, but still happy. He was excited for me, I knew it. He just didn't want me to go away for a long time.

"You're always worried. I guess that's what love is," I told him. He went in to passionately make out with me before realizing all our friends were gathered in the dorm.

"Does Angie leave at the same time as you?" Eliza asked, with a bit of nerve in her voice.

"I do," Angelica said, sighing. She wasn't as excited as I was. She found out she got the job a while ago. I just hoped she'd be paired with me. It would be nice to have a model I was already comfortable with. I was so used to sewing for Laf.

"Aw, I'll miss you. But you're a model now!" She had done some modeling before. She wasn't entirely new to it. But I knew she wanted to be an actress. She had had a few professional roles, but she was still working hard.

"Yeah," Angelica breathed, "A very worthy model." Always trying to convince herself she was good enough.

"You're beautiful, you know that? That's why you got the job," John told her, pushing some of her hair behind her ears to see her face. Last night had been hard for him, and it would stay that way for a while. But right now things were about Angie.

"Thank you," She chocked.

"There's only one person more beautiful than you," John continued.

"Excuse you?"

"Even your heavenly face crumbles in comparison to that of my little lion," He explained, putting an arm around Alexander.

"You two," Eliza sighed, "I strive for a love like that." She looked right at Alexander as she said this.

"You'll find someone, 'Liza," Angie assured her.

"When I'm thirty, maybe," She said.

"Angelica," I interrupted, "Time for us to go..." I hugged Laf one more time and began to walk in the opposite direction. We'd still be in New York. I just wouldn't be seeing them with how busy I'd be. And Angie wouldn't be seeing them either.

Alexander P.O.V.
"Alexander," Angelica looked at me. It was the day before she left, "Don't forget to write." Something in my heart changed. I loved her, I loved John, I loved everyone... but John was my one and only.

"Of course," I said tearfully, holding her hand. I appreciated the opportunity to see her in private before the group goodbye tomorrow. The day after she left, I worked all day, trying to distract myself from my friends being away.

I felt guilty returning to John that night, but I hadn't cheated. I was okay. I just was maybe a little bit neglectful.

"I'm home!" I entered. But I didn't even get a response. I wondered if John was home yet.

"John?" I called. I heard someone sniffling. It had to be him.

"John?" I went into his room. Peggy was crying, next to an unconscious John.

"Peggy, what happened?" I asked, only half expecting a reply.

"H-he... he t-t-tried t-to," She stammered, "t-t-to kill h-h-himself."

"Well, what the fuck are you doing here? How long have you been here? Why didn't you think to call an ambulance, idiot?" I screamed. She sobbed. I was infuriated. She was too weakened by the pain to do anything to help. Useless. It may have been a bit much, but I was mad. I loved him, and every second he was laying on the ground was a second he wasn't getting the help he needed.

"I-I-I-I'm s-sorry," She cried. Damn right, you're sorry. I looked at her in disgust as I dialed 911. I explained the situation hastily and then bent down to examine John's unconscious body. Peggy had left. She could take a hint.

"I'm so sorry, John," I sobbed. Was he still in there? Was he hearing what I was saying? Somewhere, deep down inside, he had to have been. If not for himself, for me. For my sanity.

I stated at his body for another ten minutes before an ambulance finally arrived. I waited in the hospital hallway all night until I finally heard those sweet words from the mouth of a stranger in scrubs;

"Alexander Hamilton? John Laurens would like to see you."

(A/N): Short, bad chapter for today. Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been pretty busy, but you guys can expect another update at some point. Anyway, I was wondering if you guys would like to see a face reveal or if I should wait until the sorry is more popular? Suggestions? Have a good night (or day)! Bye!