We make it to Petsmart without much else happening. To distract Mavis,and if I'm honest, myself, I suggest we play a game of I SPY. It's fun for a while until Mavis points out what looks like human legs sticking out from under a car we pass. the rest of the ride is relatively silent. When we get there we make sure to scope the place out text more carefully for the jellyfish, as Mavis has taken to calling them. A strange odor is emanating from the backpack and tuna is meowing loudly. My guess? He shit in it. Little girl shaking a bag isn't good for a kitty. We get inside and are greeted with many abandoned animals. I guess the day of the invasion was a dog day, because the adopt a pet room is full of nervous puppies and a few wizened old hounds. Mavis runs around frantically looking for a harness for Tuna but being distracted by fish slows the process a bit. "It's like an aquarium all for me!" She squeals,eyes full of wonder. I take a more sensible approach and look for a harness on the shelves. I find several and take them with me, along with a doggy bag of cat food. Then I hear a scream. It doesn't sound like an excited little girl scream. It sounds like a terrified little girl scream. I make a run towards the sound and I see what she was so scared of. There is a large ball python slithering around in front of her, and he looks hungry. I'm not scared, because I know she's too big a meal for it. But she doesn't know that. So I run forward and pick her up and run off to the puppies section. "Pick one out and let the rest go." I say. I open the door which was conveniently left unlocked and let her in with all those dogs. I think we will need a guard dog or two. Not every survivor will be as much of a sucker as I am. While Mavis browses the cages, I go towards the pet grooming station, harnesses and backpack containing Tuna in hand. I hope that since Tuna is a kitten it will be easier to wash her. No such luck, because as soon as I shut the door to the grooming section and open the bag, she's off, leaving behind streaks of shit much like that disgusting guy in gym class who shoved me into the locker daily had had in his underpants. I don't want to touch a shit covered kitten, but I want to travel with one even less. The car we have is relatively nice and I'd rather not ruin it yet. I chase after her until sweat is beading on my brow and then I have an idea. Catnip. I leave the room,carefully making sure Tuna is left behind. I check on Mavis, covered in drooling puppies and laughing, check. Then I grab some catnip and prepare for battle. I enter the room with a look similar to the face Kermit the frog makes when he's confused. I hear the short stinky legs coming my way, curious as to what that smell is. I prepare to trap her in a kennel filled with holes so I can wash her without fear of being covered in fecal matter. Moments later, me, one, cat, zero. She hisses and tries to claw at me as I spray her down, then I reach in and rewarded with claws as I grasp the scruff of her neck. I soap her up and rinse her again, dry her, and apply a harness with tuna fish print and a purple tutu. Mavis will get a kick out of that. She's found the one she wants when I get there. He's a big puppy sitting in her lap that Looks like a saint Bernard husky mix. He will grow into a good guard dog. Then a pup in the corner catches my eye. It's a mutt, but it doesn't interact with the other dogs. It doesn't seem to care. It looks to be about a year old, while the other one is six weeks at most. We will need both. I send Mavis to pick out collars for both of them and she comes back with a few collars. She gets a few huge ones that don't fit my dog at all,and I ask her why. She replies with " my doggy will grow big." . Nice foresight for a kid. We get a few leashes and stock up on pet food and all the candy bars at the front. I send Mavis to the car while I do one final thing. It's not right to let these animals be trapped. I let all that I can loose, but I doubt most of them will survive. Better than dying in a cage. The fish are screwed, but the rats will be fine. So will the dogs. We get in the car with our new pets, and Mavis asks "what now?" I don't know what to say, so I just hand her the map and tell her to pick somewhere to go. She gets quiet, and asks me if we can go get some clothes and find a place to stay the night. I say yes and we play Disney songs the whole ride. We find a hotel with the power on in the middle of the highway and we stay there. I chuckle at the no pets allowed sign as we enter the suite. I guess I won't have to fear being alone, think to myself. Is it smart to have so many creatures depending on me? Probably not. But this is the robot alien apocalypse. Better to die with friends. Even if those friends are a kid with a split personality, a demented cat, a big dumb puppy and a disturbingly intelligent looking dog.
