Rift

Chapter 9

By the time we were ready to head back to Toronto, the sky was growing dark. It was quiet in the car; I didn't listen to the radio, I wanted to just be able to think, and to think about anything I would need zero distractions, including music. Music was usually such a sweet release for me, a good way to get my mind off things, but I didn't think I could handle to background noise on top of the chaos in my head. While I'd been having the dreams for a while, all of this new information and new pain was a lot to handle.

The lights were still on when I got home, and upon entering the kitchen, Mom and Dad stood up from the chairs that I am sure they had been sitting in since I left and came over to hug me, sandwiching me between them as tears poured from their eyes. I could feel pools beginning to well in my own eyes but I tried to keep them back so as not to upset them more.

"We are so sorry, kiddo," Dad said, pulling away and wiping his eyes and nose with his sleeves, "Your Mot-Molly and I were talking and...if you want to, that is, if you feel the need to, you can go. I know you're probably feeling very betrayed right about now, and Dr. McKinnon said you were more than welcome to go and live with them if you felt compelled to."

"What are you talking about? Why would I want to leave? You guys are my family, you took care of me and I can never thank you enough for that. I love you guys," I cried, releasing the waterfalls from my eyes.

I wanted to have a quiet evening with my parents, no distractions, and I certainly didn't want to think about what had happened today. My head was pounding like a jackhammer in a construction site, and anything that would take my mind off the fact that I was from the past and that the woman who had given me life was dead, that I'd seen her grave and sat overtop of her bones. It was the most depressing thing to think about.

We sat and watched The Bachelor, one of the programs I took a great deal of pleasure in watching; I couldn't help but laugh at the poor, dumb girls who would drone on and on about how in love with the guy they were after having known the bachelor for a grand total of a few days. The drama never ceased to amaze me either, some of them were almost as petty as Cassandra was, if not more so. One girl was whining about how fake the girl who'd taken her top off at the beach was, and it was one of the T.V. shows my parents and I really enjoyed to watch together when I wasn't occupying the T.V. with anime and sci-fi shows. It was a good end to a not-so-good day.

After the show was done, we said our goodnights before going off to our separate rooms. Luca was asleep in my bed when I opened the door, so I turned off the light and crawled into the bed beside him, smiling as he realized I was there and wrapped his arms around me, resting my head on his warm chest.

"I'm glad you're back, babe," he whispered, kissing my forehand and holding me just a bit tighter.

"Thanks for being here," I whispered. I nuzzled my head into his chest, just taking a moment to breathe before I let myself into a desperately needed sleep.

"You'll come to me someday, when the pain gets to be too much and the ease of living in this modern world has passed. You'll come and beg me to kill you, and I'm such a gentleman that I will happily oblige your request. Maybe if you're good, I won't make your parents watch. If you come sooner rather than later maybe I'll leave your little boy toy alone. I could do it you know, I could drink the time right out of him just like I've done to countless others before. Think about it Sawyer, you wouldn't want all these people to die because of you now would you?" Thaddeus said, his voice melting over me like butter but burning me at the same time. I heard him in my head, calling out from a forgotten past and taunting me as if he were right up close.

I screamed and writhed, images of my loved ones being drained of life flashing behind my closed eyelids; I could see him ripping out Luca's heart and staring at it as if it were an apple before taking a bite out of it, savoring it, and smiling. I saw Dr. McKinnon carrying Sophie's body, her eyes shut and clothes covered in blood, and I saw Artie, looking back over his shoulder at a me that wasn't there, tears in his bloodshot eyes.

"Don't you see, my dear? Has it not yet crossed your mind? You won't escape me, no matter how hard you try," I tried to get away from him, but every corner of my head that I ran to was full of his infectious laughter, "Such a funny little thing, thinking you can run from me. I'm in your bloodstream, my dear; you can't run from what's already got you."

"SAWYER, WAKE UP!" I could hear Luca shouting at me, shaking my shoulders as he tried to rouse me from this nightmare, "MR. AND MRS. JACKSON, SOMETHING'S WRONG!"

I felt another pair of hands grab my body, then another, before my Mom finally spoke, "Sawyer honey, wake up, please baby, wake up!"

I tried to escape my head, to run to them, but it was as if he wouldn't let me leave until I gave in, or at least not until I was sufficiently frightened. "MOM, LUCA!" I cried, but I knew they couldn't hear me, or at least they couldn't hear the words. I knew I was screaming, that much was real, but I wasn't even sure if this was a dream anymore.

"CALL DR.MCKINNON!" Dad shouted, my Mom's small and delicate hands were gone, undoubtedly to call one of the only people who could help me.

It's a scary thing, being trapped in your own mind. Once you were there, there wasn't a lot you could do to escape, because the thing that was keeping you there to begin with was what was supposed to help you escape. There was nowhere that you could run that was safe, no exit or escape route that you could take to leave, you were just trapped there until it decided to set you free.

Thaddeus laughed again, but this time I could see his face as if he were right in front of me. "How about we come to an agreement my dear, something mutually beneficial. If you come to me, I won't kill your family and your delicious little boyfriend. Does that sound agreeable to you" he said, walking towards the self that was trapped in my head, smirking.

"How do I know you would keep your word even if I listened to you?" I asked.

"You don't" he laughed. My eyes flew open mid scream, but as soon as I could see the faces of everyone around me, or, everyone I cared about at least, the scream abated and my pulse slowed.

"You scared the shit out of us!" Luca shouted, practically dive bombing the bed and wrapping his arms around me. I was grateful for the contact and the reminder that this was the real world.

"Sawyer, what happened?" Dr. McKinnon asked; apparently he'd arrived while I was still under Thaddeus' apparent control.

"He was in my head, taunting me and threatening all of you, threatening me and trying to make me let him get me, let him win, I...I don't know how he did it, but he can get in my head for real now," I cried.

"She needs to go see him," Dr. McKinnon said, "If we want to get to the bottom of it, she's going to have to go and actually talk to him. That's the only thing I can think of at the moment that might possibly help. Perhaps it's a closure thing, perhaps their connection was just too strong, I don't know. Thaddeus is incredibly powerful, even locked in his cell, so who knows. I need to talk to Chris about this, maybe he'll know."

Artie stood beside the bed chewing on his cuticles, or fingernails, I couldn't tell which, but he hadn't spoken at all before now, "How the hell did he get inside her head like this? It's not like he's had physical contact with her since before she came through the rift, there's no way in hell a connection would last that long if it were even possible."

"I want to go. I want this dealt with and done, I don't want to deal with this anymore. How soon can we leave?" I asked, sitting bolt upright in bed. The mood of the room was noticeably darker, somber almost.

"Sawyer, if he has this strong of a connection with your mind..."Luca said.

"I'll have to arrange it, but we should be able to get in in three days. That's about how long it takes for the people to get back to me, but one of the other guardians owes me a favour so maybe I'll be able to get in sooner. You've got to understand, with someone as dangerous as Thaddeus, just like any other serial killer, it takes quite a bit of persuading to get a visitation," Dr. McKinnon said.

"I don't care, please just do it; I don't want to live in constant fear anymore, I want to just live a relatively normal life," I said, "Can everyone just...can everyone go now? I want to try and get some sleep. I dunno if you've noticed, but it kinda kicks the crap out of me every time this happens."

Everyone except Luca left, giving me some time to just relax before the next nightmare would likely take hold. I curled into Luca's arms and watched him fall asleep, not daring to do so myself.