My Terrible Curse...Or Is It A Blessing?

Chapter 10: Back to School

I went to bed early that night. Mom had told me that I had to go to school the next day. I could not fall asleep. I was so afraid for the next day. How would my peers treat me after being gone for so long? How many of them knew what happened? What if no one talked to me? These were the worries that raced through my head all night. I started to feel nauseous again. I groaned and looked over at my alarm clock. It was two o’clock in the morning. I hadn’t slept at all, and the morning sickness was starting to kick in. I was completely unsure of how I would get through school today.

I stood up and started getting dizzy, so I sat back down. The nauseous feeling was overbearing. I stumbled to the bathroom. I got there just in time to vomit in the toilet. I spent the next two hours vomiting and crying, waiting for it to be over again so I could get ready for school. Once it passed I went down stairs and drank some water to get the awful taste out of my mouth. My mom walked down stairs as I was making pancakes for myself.

“You’re up early,” she stated obviously still partially asleep.

“Yeah, couldn’t sleep,” I explained, not wanting to tell her about my morning sickness.

“You have a big day ahead of you.”

“I know, I’m pretty nervous,” I stated still occupied by making pancakes.

“Nervous enough to make yourself sick,” she stated more than asked. Shit she knew. I didn’t want to worry her with my morning sickness. “It’s normal,” she explained, “every pregnant woman goes through it. I wish you would tell me when these things happen. I’m worried about you, and you wanting to deal with this by yourself isn’t helping. I want a healthy grandchild, and at the age of thirteen, almost fourteen, you don’t know how to take care of yourself while pregnant yet. Remember, I went through three pregnancies so I know what I am talking about.”

“I know, Mom,” I said as my alarm started going off upstairs, signaling it was time to get ready for school. I ran upstairs and sat in my room for at least twenty minutes just trying to decide what I wanted to wear to school. Once I figured it out I quickly got dressed and ran to my bathroom again to get ready. My mom told me the night before that she would be taking me to school today. I had five more minutes to get ready. I grabbed my book bag that I hadn’t even touched in two and a half months and walked downstairs. Mom asked if I was ready and I told her I was so we left. Alexander usually drove Mathew to school, but I liked to get to school earlier so I always walked or my mom would take me on her way to work.  We arrived at the school and butterflies filled my stomach. I felt sick again.

“I don’t want to go,” I told my mom holding back tears.

“You have to sweetie, you will never return to a normal life if you don’t start going back to school.” Her words were comforting. I finally got out of the car and walked up the familiar walk into the middle school. I walked in the building and I felt like all eyes were on me, but no one spoke. I hurried up the stairs to my locker, staring at the floor the whole way there, hoping that I wouldn’t run into any of my friends. No one spoke to me the whole morning, not even my best friends. People just stared at me as I walked by and teachers just gave me all the work I missed. I would be behind until summer. I wouldn’t be surprised if I failed seventh grade year. At least I had straight A’s before the incident. The morning was silent and full of emotion. Finally, a guy approached me, and I recognized him as one of the basketball players.

“Hey,” he said smiling, but looking pretty nervous.

“Hey,” I managed to mutter.

“I’m Joe,” he said obviously trying to make conversation. I wondered why he was talking to me. He was pretty cute, I thought to myself, then immediately hated myself for thinking that. I was pregnant I didn’t need to be hooking up with random guys and after what happened with Dave, I couldn’t even look a guy in the eyes.

“I’m Lizzy,” I replied.

“Where have you been the last three months,” he asked and I sighed I knew this was coming. “Everyone has been talking,” he continued. I walked away with tears in my eyes. I was right I wasn’t ready to come back to school, to talk about what happened.

I was sitting in fourth period; just waiting for the day to be over, I got a pass to go to the guidance office. My fourth period teacher gave me a look, but let me go. Waiting for me was the guidance counselor at our school. I so wasn’t ready to talk about this yet.

“Hello, Lizzy, how have you been,” she asked. Her voice brought comfort, but I still wasn’t ready to talk.

“Fine,” I muttered.

“I called you down to check in on you, see how your first day is going, see if you need anything. If you would like to talk about what happened, everything in confidential here, I won’t tell anyone else.” She told me and I sat there staring at the wall with tears in my eyes. I couldn’t reply, so she continued. “From what I have heard you have had a rough couple of months, but I want you to know that you can always come here to have someone to talk to. You won’t be able to get through this all by yourself, like you might want to. Not many people your age have to go through the horrifying events that you had to. Usually after something like what you have experienced, the victim may have thoughts of hurting or even killing themselves. Have you had any thoughts like that?”

“No, no I could never do that, I couldn’t do that to my blub,” I replied, without thinking, through tears.

“You blub,” she asked with a quizzical look on her face. Oh shit I thought again. She would be the first person I had to tell, besides my family.

“I...I…I am pregnant,” I said. This was much easier than telling my family but still extremely hard to do. She sat there in shock for a second, and then regained herself.

“Do your parents know,” she asked, and I told her that they did. She continued, “whose child is it, if you don’t mind me asking.” I told her it was Dave’s and she asked questions about the pregnancy and my day so far. She tried to talk about what happened a couple of times but I would just change the subject. Finally, the bell rang signaling the end of forth period. We both stood up simultaneously, she told me to come see her when I am ready to talk about it but not to rush it, and I walked out the door on my way to fifth period. My quiet walk to fifth period was quickly interrupted when I reached my fifth period class’s door. An all too familiar face approached me.

“Lizzy!” I heard her squeal. “I missed you so much! I was so worried! When I found out I couldn’t even believe it! Why didn’t you text me at all?”

“Uh, sorry, I don’t have a phone right now,” I explained briefly.

“Ok,” she said obviously disappointed. “We need to catch up some time. Oh, you should spend the night this weekend!” she exclaimed.

“Well, I have a lot of work to catch up on so maybe not this weekend, but I’ll see when I can.” I said still not nearly as excited or energetic as her. She used to be my best friend up until two weeks before I had been abducted. We got into a big fight over something really stupid that I couldn’t even remember anymore. Something like me talking to a guy she liked, I think. It all seemed so pointless now. Amber and I had been friends forever it seemed like, but now I didn’t even want to talk to her. I wasn’t mad, by any means; I guess the whole experience had just changed me.

“Ok, well we need to catch up, like big time. And, uh, I’m sorry about what happened before you left I hope we can be friends again,” she said. Left, left, I didn’t leave I was taken! Left sounded so voluntary. This by no means was a voluntary experience.

“Yea,” I muttered as the bell rang, and everyone took their seats. The rest of the day lugged on, but finally the last bell rang, signaling the end of seventh period, and the end of the day. I walked to my locker. I felt like all eyes were still on me and I could hear people whispering. I walked outside the school almost in tears. I never wanted to go back to school again. Alexander was already waiting in his car to pick me up. I climbed in the passenger’s seat and we went to get Mathew from school. Alexander kept looking at me. He finally asked, “how was school?”

“I never want to go back, those people will never understand,” I said and started crying heavily. Alexander sighed and kept driving. We finally arrived home and my mind raced with all the assignments I had to make up but all I wanted to do right now was cry, and once again, I cried myself to sleep.