Wilder

1.

I ignored the dreaded silence from behind the door, leaning against it and sliding down to the ground. I felt the body heat of Wilder break through the wood and into my bloodstream, and I resisted the burning urge to burst in there.

"Is there a reason for this?", I asked, trying to keep my voice as calm as I could. If I were to get upset, it'd only become worse.

"Not really", a lifeless voice said, and I sighed.

"We can work this out", I said, and the desperate in my voice almost made me flinch, "You have to talk to someone about this...Som..."

"I'm talking to you", he cut me off in a dangerous voice and I shut up. A second later there were rushed breaths, heavy like my heart and painful like I feared they would be.

Wilder spoke again, making me twitch with surprise: "Kierra was at it again tonight"

I remembered the curvy, blonde girl with an attitude. Earlier this evening, she was on the dance floor, getting wasted and making out with various guys. She's so broken, but in such a different way, I cannot compare her to Wilder.

"She'll end up in a hospital", I said, and I heard the boy on the opposite side of the door stifle a humorless laugh.

"I'm pretty sure that's what she's aiming for", his voice lowered, letting out a little of the real mood roam free through the air. Another sharp breath filled the air, and I squeezed my eyes shut as I listened to my best friend sigh with relief.

"Wilder", I said, feeling like I might break but knowing there is nothing I can do to stop this, "Are you done?"

Even, relaxed breaths came from behind the door, and I twitched when his overly hoarse voice responded.

"Can I come in?", I questioned, getting up and slipping into the bathroom after a few moments of silence. Wilder gave me a blank look, not bothering to protest. It wasn't my first time doing this, and we both knew very well that I wouldn't tell anyone.

I took some gaze and kneeled in front of his seemingly frail form. Wilder wasn't of strong built, and he was so skinny that I often felt like he could shatter. But, my friend was, by no means, fragile. He was shorter than me and looked weak, but his eyes were made of steel.

I never understood it.

He didn't even tense up when I caught his right hand and turned it over, noticing how vividly red his blood looked against his now even paler skin. I cleaned it with the gaze, frowning when I realized there was more blood than usually.

The drops on the floor appeared surreal, like something you will never see in real life.

The cuts were perfect lines, not deeper than a couple of millimeters, but they were still far too savage. I accidentally grazed his wound as I was reaching for more bandages, but that didn't even make him twitch.

I gave him a sad look, and he scowled with disgust at my expression.

"Second drawer, far to the left", he said when I realized there wasn't any more, his voice sleepy but his stormy eyes completely awake when the met mine which were the color of mud.

I caught his elbow, quickly covering the cuts and finally stopping the bleeding. At least for now.

"So, you're going to tell me what this was about?", I pushed, already knowing he wouldn't tell me a thing. He never did.

Wilder kept for himself, those ice cold eyes always appearing like they were hiding something. He never talked about it, never explained the reasons for his behavior.

"I told you already, Cas. There is no real reason", he shrugged, his irises showing a spark of amusement for a second.

"You seemed to be having so much fun tonight", I noted, remembering how he was even interested enough to notice Kierra's self-destructive behavior. I even had the guts to hope he had gotten better. What a fool I am, to think something like this will go away just like that.

"I...eh, I was kind of drunk", he detailed, waving it away with his dominant, left hand.

"You should go home", Wilder smiled, but it never reached his eyes, "Your brother will be worried"

"Are you alright?", I asked, fearing he might do something worse than just cutting if I leave him like this, "If you want, I could stay ov..."

"I'm fine, Cas", he chuckled, getting up in one even, dead movement, "I feel a lot better now"

"But, what'll you do? Your mom will notice", I pushed, worried, "You did it in a different area so it might show"

"She won't notice", he said, and his eyes were blank once again.

"How are you so sure?"

"Haven't you noticed already, Caspian? My mother never looks at me anymore. Not in years. It'll be fine"