Sad stories

Kill Me Please...

((AN:This story is only about my feelings. I was trying to right a angst one but that didn't work))

Life is a nuisance. LIfe is hell, I just wanna bury myself and die. Can't you let me do that? Why can't you let me be? There's something wrong with me. The beast inside of me is a demon, a demon I fight everyday, scars on my wrist, scars on my stomach, scars on my arms, and scars on my stomach.

I mean, aren't scars beautiful? They are. I love scars, especially the ones on my wrist that I hide with my sleeve and bracelets. They hide many things that are forbidden to see. Why must I hide these emotions? Why can't I let them ride out? Because. I'm forbidden to. I'm forbidden to cry my heart out, forbidden to scream, when it's night. I let all out all the emotion at the bottom of my body out. I took the blade to my wrist and put it down as I soon first made a letter.

"I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for you.'

I laughed, laughed, and laughed. The pain, feeling it go through my whole arm, oh... It seems like I cut my vein open! Yay, I can finally escape this cruel world that we live in.

Heh, nobody would care right? Right! So, might as well just ya know, die and just sang softly.

"And I held your hand all through theses years, and you don't have....All of me..."

I laid down and closed my eyes, seeing a bright light come through my visions. Why, why was it so hard to reunite with someone you miss? Why can't you have them back? Why why why why why?!

IT ISN'T FAIR!!

I just want him back... I want him back... To have him in my arms, to kiss his head, for him to cuddle Arena, for him to have babies with Arena... I miss him. I maybe a bad owner but, if he could feed off of my love, he'd still be alive...Please!

I just want him back... Is that so hard to ask for? Just... Please give him back even if it was hard to do.. I just miss him and I want him back.

I miss him very much, I had to get him back with my own life then so be it. I'll use my own life to save my pet rabbit, Prince.

Is it so hard to ask and have them back as well?

Why...Why can't they be brought by with love? Why can't they come back-- no.. Why can't they feed off of my love towards them?

Arena is lonely and I'm mourning as well for him too.

Nothing will change if we just continue to mourn him. Sure, he can see that we're mourning for him too, but nothing will change. It'll be hard to forget him like that. I don't want Arena to die, and I don't want to sit back and listen to everybody saying that I was reason that Prince died.

No I wasn't, it's all my sisters fault. If we either went to the vet or disinfected the wound, HE WOULD'VE BEEN ALIVE RIGHT!

Nobody sees that. Nobody, not even my parents know that I was sexual harrased. Do you know how it is to have a facade almost everyday..? I hate it. I hate it. I HATE IT! Nobody fucking cares and nobody will... Why can't they fucking see that?

My question is who, or what can save this broken family? Nothing..Even if I told my mothers this, all she'll do will just laugh softly and kiss my cheek. She wouldn't care, she only read the 'important part' of what I wrote. She didn't care about my feelings. Besides, nobody cares if I died. My older sister wouldn't care. She doesn't feed me only because I'm '13'. So what? That doesn't mean I can cook for myself. Oh, but when I started to cut myself and she found out. That's why she wants to start caring and shit. Fake ass bitch, I hope Satan enjoys torturing you in hell. After I tried run away, my father didn't care. Why would he? He curses at me, what kind of father curse at their own daughter? That's stupid shit that he does.

Fake ass, having me the 'maid' of the house. They really need to fuck off because I'm tired of this shit. And if I ever told them I'm depressed, they're just gonna brush it off of their shoulder like it's nothing and tell me "it's a phrase, get over it." Do you really think that's a fucking phrase? No it's not.

If I was successful in committing suicide, you wouldn't be saying anything and just be like "oh she's just sleeping." How about you just look fucking closer.

Can't you tell that I'm slowly giving up? I'm giving up on trying to be happy, I'm tired of trying to be friendly when I just want to be alone. I'm tired of life, I gave up on life a long time ago, if only you knew. Knew how I felt, but no. There's nobody I can actually trust in this hows. To all those people bullied me, lied to me, being the cause for why I cut, and put the blame on me for this I didn't mean in a mean way...Congrats. Hands to you, for those who didn't..I'm happy to still be alive to be with you but no, this isn't a suicide letter. I'm just putting my feelings into this.