just a bunch of thoughts.

.3

💫i'm a goner somebody catch my breath 💫 her eyes, which were once blue and sparking are now grey and dull. her smile keep getting getting less and less bright and cheerful and turned in to a fake smile in which she would use to show her friends she was "fine". her personality changed, she was once bubbly and cheerful but then it all went downhill and now she's rude, tough, and acts like she doesn't care. on the inside she breaking, and she can't tell anyone. she can't. she's supposed to be the strong big girl who is happy all the time and doesn't cry or have bad days. she doesn't want to let anyone down. she doesn't want to lose anyone. but she did. she realized that she wasn't okay. she didn't want to tell anyone. she wanted them to think she's okay. she knew that one day she'd be gone. forever. and she would be the one who did it to herself. she didn't want anyone to cry. she didn't want people to be upset. so she started pushing them away. she became distant. trying to get people to leave. so they wouldn't be sad when she left. she knows the days are counting down. she knows the exact day she wants too.  she's ready. she's already relapsed. she's already cried her tears out. it may not be today. but she's ready. 💫 i'm a goner, no one caught my breath...💫