I'm Fine......... Help Me.

i cannot believe

i had a friend that was my best friend since fourth grade.

lets name her Juno.

i went to the school carnival to surprise people since i was homeschooled and i saw her about 40 minutes before i left. i was excited cause i was about to surprise her.

she didnt even remeber me. she forgot who i was. like i never existed. yet her tall friend standing next to her remembered who i was. even though we barely spoke a word to each other.

Juno forgot i was relevant. that my life was on this earth.

she came over to my house over 15 times.

she went to my church twice.

i went to the mall with her with another friend.

that year i went to the mall with her.

it hasn't even been a year of homeschool, of school period, and she forgot who i was..

my so called best friend forgot i was alive.

she looked at me as if she was looking at something that makes her disgusted. she looked at me the way she looked at her enimies.

i have never been so emmbarrassed in my life. 

i should've talked to her more.

texted her more

facetime her more.

maybe she would remember i existed if i didn't stop talking to her..

god i hate her

i despise her

im boiling like a pot overflowing

never trust people that you would believe they were friends.

friends are ones that go back to you.

that you might not talk to for a year or two and they would call you up, or you would bump into them one day and they would remember your face.

or at least your name.

Juno didnt even remeber my name.

isnt that amazing?!?!?!?!?!

ISNT IT FUCKING AMAZING THAT MY BEST FRIEND FORGOT WHO I FUCKING WAS WHEN WE SOPPED TALKING FOR FIVE FUCKING MONTHS.

i have a friend whose name is (shortening it to keep her identity safe) Ang  thehumble_trashcan will know who im talking about. i barely talked to her seventh grade. but she saw my face at the carnival and screamed, estatic to see me. people i was barely friends with smiled or bear hugged me.

the song above is a song Juno dedicated to me. i loved this song so much.

i dedicated superficial love to her. cause this was her favourite song.

she probably wont even remeber any of that.

i only trust few people. Chloe, Justin, Ang, Hannah, and very few more.

just needed to rant.

bye...