Hey you!
You're probably wondering why I made this book, and the answer is " I have no clue " or I kinda do know but the reason is kinda cheese so...yeah.
In this book I'll tell u guys about my life, dreams, thoughts etc.
Okey so a quick back story...I fucked up..big time.
I'm that type of person that's afraid of getting attached to other people. So when I start feeling like I'm special around someone I usually walk away...I disappear from there lives. Bc I know that if I stay I'll get attached. But 2 years ago (kinda) I started seeing someone (friend), I felt safe with her...she was my best friend. But ones I started felling like I meant something to her I felt afraid, afraid of getting attached to her. But as much as I tried to disappear I couldn't...I was drawn back to her, every time I tried to disappear. My mind wanted her to forget about me but my heart wanted her to never leave me. After a while of trying to disappear I realized that I'm never going to fully disappear from her mind so I decided to make her hate me...even though it would hurt me as well. So I started blaming everything on her..and I started fights and I finished them as well bc she was too kind to do anything. I was being a dick too her, just bc I was scared she might leave me. But some how we got back together...I couldn't be without her. But then everything started back up again, I started fights bc I was afraid. But then something happened I successfully disappeared from her life...but now all I can think about is her, right now I don't care if she might leave me in the future I just want too see her smile bc of me one more time...one more time. I need her too be happy...but when I see her happy I realize that she's not happy bc of me...she's happy bc I'm not there...I've tried to talk to her or at least give her hints that I miss her but I really think I've lost her forever.
If ure reading this e : plz come back, plz give me one last chance too make everything okey again
