Not My Friends (Pokémon)

Crumble

Sticking his face over Selene's Xtransceiver, Gladion growled, "What does she want?"

Lillie bit her lip, looking just as concerned as her brother felt. "I don't know. She just...demanded to speak with you. I don't think she's going to say anything...abusive. If she does, stop listening. I'll try to stop her, and Selene can hang up if gets too bad."

"I don't want to talk to her," Gladion snarled. "Doesn't she realize what she did is unacceptable? You must be a better person than me, Lillie, because I sure as hell am not going to forgive her! Is she too stupid to understand what she did to us?"

"Nobody's asking you to forgive her, Gladion..." Lillie sighed gently. "She just wants to talk."

Gladion felt like he was going to cry, but he wouldn't. He didn't cry in front of people, and he wasn't going to start now. He wasn't planning to start ever.

He just had to pray his mother wouldn't push his limits.

What if she broke him again?

He wanted to believe he was stable now, but he'd be lying to himself if he did.

After all this time, he was still unhinged.

Hau leaned in and whispered into his ear, "If anything happens, you can just leave with me. I won't let you get hurt again, okay? I'll take care of you."

Though not without a considerably large dose of disgrace, Gladion wondered why he hadn't met someone like Hau earlier in his life.

Maybe he had. Maybe those children who were once his friends, those children whose faces he couldn't quite remember, would grow up to be just as loving as Hau.

But he'd lost them.

What if he lost Hau?

"You'll stay here when I'm talking to her?" Gladion said back in the form of a question. Hau nodded in response while Selene and Lillie exchanged perplexed glances through Xtransceiver.

"All right," Lillie said, inhaling deeply. "I'm going to give my Xtransceiver to Mother. But I'll be standing right outside and..." She bit her lip. "You'll be fine, Gladion."

Gladion swallowed the bile that rose in his throat as he was met with the face of the one person he wished he could escape forever, but somehow always ended up with.

This was his mother.

But she didn't deserve to be.

"Selene, Sweet Hau..." Lusamine said, her voice coming up a rasp. "Gladion..." She tried to smile and managed it, albeit weakly.

Gladion remembered what Lillie had determined only three months after deporting to Kanto. She'd said there was only so much they could do to help their mother recover from the extensive damage she'd suffered due to being under the intense influence of Nihilego's neurotoxins for so long. She'd said she might always be this frail, for the rest of her life.

And to be honest, though he knew it was cruel, Gladion didn't have an issue with that.

He knew it was horrible of him, but if he had to be faced with his monstrosity of a mother again, he wouldn't let it be with her being completely happy and healthy.

Yes, he loved her. Yes, she was his mother.

But no, he would not forgive her.

Gladion gritted his teeth. "What do you want...Lusamine?"

His mother's smile collapsed, her eyes clouding over with sadness. "I see you still won't call me Mother...I understand. I don't...I can't believe what I did to you and your sister."

"You should believe it," Gladion blurted out in the form of a hiss. "You know the neurotoxins do nothing but lower your inhibitions, right? It wasn't like you were being possessed."

He could hear Lillie hiss back, "Gladion...!" from the somewhere he couldn't see on the screen of the Xtransceiver.

Somewhere within him, he expected Lusamine to lose it like she usually did, like she always had. He'd struck a nerve, and she would beat him for it. She would make sure he regretted it.

But Lusamine looked weak and hurt, and nothing manic came over her face. "I know, Gladion. I know."

Hau gripped Gladion's shoulder and Gladion sighed, trying release at least some of the tension inside of him. Hau smiled wryly.

"I'm sorry, it's just...I can't...It's really hard for me to believe that..." Gladion looked down, holding back the tears that were undoubtedly welling in his eyes. He hoped nobody could tell, but though Selene couldn't seem to, Hau wiped his eyes with his sleeve.

Before hearing his mother's voice again, Gladion wondered briefly where, exactly, his relationship with Hau was going.

Was it supposed to be going somewhere?

Did he want it to go somewhere?

"That I've changed..." Lusamine filled in quietly. "I understand. You don't have to forgive me...I heard you saying to Lillie that you don't forgive me."

"I don't, but I suppose that doesn't have to mean that I hate you."

Yes, it did.

It did and Gladion hated both her and himself for it.

And when Lusamine smiled again, Gladion hated the fact that she couldn't tell when he was lying.

"Thank you, Gladion. I never thought we'd end up this way." Lusamine looked away uneasily. "I was always strict and a bit selfish, but what I did...what I did after your father disappeared..."

"It was unacceptable. But as long as you don't do it again..." Gladion trailed off, because he couldn't afford to make any promises, for forgiveness or otherwise.

If he did, he'd probably break them.

He would try as hard as he could, but no matter what, he knew there would always be bitterness in his heart for Lusamine.

She was the reason why he was...this.

Why he was a cold, insecure mess.

It was all her fault.

"I won't. I never will. Never again," Lusamine said with a fragile determination in both her face and her voice.
"I can see you...You don't want to talk to me, do you? It's all right...Lillie!"

Lillie took back the Xtransceiver and Gladion was trembling. Hau wrapped his arms around the older boy, trying in vain to steady him.

Lillie was smiling. "You did great, Gladion. Thank you so much. I know you'll never forgive her, but...but...Gladion?"

Turning to look at the blonde, Selene and Hau were greeted with a sight they'd never expected to see, and that they didn't ever want to.

He might've been trying to cover his face with his arm, and he might've been gritting his teeth so that he didn't make any noise, but it was unmistakable.

Gladion was crying.