Tyler and Rose have been friends for what seemed like forever. Both born and raised in California. They both have goals for themselves, but will Rose's addiction affect their dreams or better yet their relationship?
As I stare at my dark attire in the mirror I once again remind myself that this is the day I spread my father's ashes. The only one that truly cared for me as a child growing up unlike my mother when she was drinking. And the one I shut out of my life for so many years. As I continue to stare at my long black dress in the mirror someone else comes in to join me in staring, Greg. He grabs one of my hands never taking his eyes off of me in the mirror, "It's time Rose." He says quietly. I nod my head and turn away in the direction of the door, where Tyler and Jasmine were waiting as well. I take Jasmine and Tyler's hand in mine as we walk outside where the all black funeral home limo was waiting to escort us to where the ceremony would be held, a beautiful and peaceful lake in the depths of California. Dad used to take me there when I was little, I thought it was only right that I spread his ashes into the lake there. As we drive I stare out of the window and take into full account just how beautiful California is, I guess I never really notice since I've been living here my entire life, but it's something to think about. After about 40 silent minutes of driving we pull in to see the beautiful green grass and trees surrounding the calming lake, it brings back memories for me. I told Tyler about this place before, about me and my dad's trips, but I never brought him to see for himself. Greg helps me out of the limo as everybody that came gathers into one big group. I see friends and family of my Dad that I never see on a regular basis that come to me and give me a hug and ask me how I've been, but I wasn't in the mood for that I just wanted to remember and celebrate my dads life. Once I see that everybody is gathered I clear my throats to speak, "Hello everyone thank you for coming to celebrate the life of my father, Dennis Bertram. I am his one and only child, Rose Bertram, if you may not know. As most of you are aware my father was never a very religious man therefore he wished to be cremated. At this time we will board the canoes for the spreading of my fathers ashes." I say calmly as everyone nods in agreement being helped one by one into the canoes. Me, Greg, Jasmine, and Tyler share a canoe as we pull off towards the center of the lake.
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I put my hair up and sigh enjoying the cool breeze flowing. I close my eyes and picture me and my dad rowing in our canoe making out what shapes the clouds looked like. I was oblivious to the fact that I was crying before I feel a finger wipe away my tear and someone else hug me. Jasmine wiped away my tear, Tyler hugged me tightly, and Greg caressed my knee. Soon enough the canoes came to a stop. I stand up and take my dads urn into my hands. Tears streaming down my face. I look around to see the beautiful family of my dads side, my cousins, aunties,uncles. I take a deep breath before speaking trying to prep my voice, although it failed because as I started to talk my voice immediately cracked with pain. "M-my dad was an amazing brother, friend, companion, and father. Before my mother became ill with her addiction and committed suicide, me and my father cherished a great, standard father-daughter relationship. After my mom died I discovered that my dad knew about her being ill and never helped her get better. I was so angry at him for many years. I left as soon as I turned 18 and never looked back." As I try not to break down crying I look to the sky closing my eyes. I feel a warm hand on my back from Greg, but I continue on with my words. "I regret not listening to his reasoning and taking him for granted. I guess I never truly realized how much he truly meant to me until he was gone. I will always love you and I will always miss you dad. I love you." I say as I open the urn and pour some of the ashes out into the lake. That's when most of the family including myself lost all calmness and started to cry. I set the urn back down and took my seat next to Greg as he pulls me close to him while I let out my tears. I then hear my dads favorite brother, uncle Anthony speak, also with hurt laced in his voice, "And now we will play my brothers favorite song." I take my face out of Greg's chest as I hear the music start to play.
I smile at the song because that really was his favorite. He always played it while we drove in the car. Everyone also smiled or chuckled at the song knowing he truly adored it. We listen in silence until the song ends and the canoes are being rowed back to land. Greg helps me out as I wait for Tyler and Jasmine. Jasmine kisses me on the cheek and says, "I'm proud of you Rose, you're so strong." I nod my head and smile at her. Tyler comes to me hugs me and also kisses me on the cheek, "I'll always be here Rose, always." I nod at him hug him tightly again and I then kiss him on the cheek in return. When we released and he walked away I couldn't help but feel some sort of emptiness take over, like things would be different from now on. I shrug it way focusing my attention on greeting my family. I walk over to my uncle Anthony as he sees me and hugs me tightly kissing me on the forehead and saying he's proud of me. I continue to greet my other aunts and uncles until I come across someone I haven't seen since a young teenager but I love so dearly, my cousin Ava. "Ava?" I ask as she turns around. "Rosy!" She says tackling me in a hug. I let out a small laugh as I hug her back with just as much force. "Come on baby we got so much to talk about." She says pulling me to a more secluded area away from the crowd.
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"So how have you been feeling? Have you talked to anybody about losing your dad?" She asks. "I'll manage. And yes I've been talking to Greg about everything." I answer. "Oh is Greg your boo that I saw earlier?" "I mean we're not official yet we've only known each other for about 2 months. But he makes me really happy and he's been there for me. I mean he knows about this whole process, he's lost his father as well." I say. She puts her hand over heart and makes a sad face," I'm so sorry sweetheart that you have to go through this. You know better than anyone in this family that I loved Uncle Dennis like he was a second father to me." I nod my head in agreement as we continue to talk and share a few laughs here and there. "Rose, it's time for us to leave." Tyler says quietly. I nod my head before hugging Ava tightly and exchanging numbers promising to never go this long again without talking to one another. We pile back into the limo to once again be escorted back to my apartment. When we make it back Jasmine announces that she'll be cooking Alfredo pasta with sausage in it. Tyler sits down on the couch while I grab Greg's hand and lead him back to my room. He didn't get to fully close the door before I attacked him with a passionate kiss. He was caught off guard but soon relaxed into it before I let up and stared into his eyes. "Will you be my boyfriend Greg?" I ask. "I mean I was supposed to ask you that question first but of course I'll be your boyfriend. And you'll be my girlfriend right?" He says. "Of course baby." I say before kissing him again as we fall onto the bed and I hit my head. "Ouch." I say rubbing it Greg replaces my hand with his rubbing where I hit my head. "Are you okay?" He asks concerned. "Yeah." I say as we stare in silence before we start chuckling which turns into full on laughter. Today may have been somewhat gloomy, but one thing it was for sure was beautiful.
