The light behind our eyes (killjoys/Party Poison fanfic )

One

I opened my eyes to the alarm clock by my bed blaring in my ears. The noise hurt. I lifted up my arm to press the button and make the noise stop. Groaning, I buried my head into my tear-stained pillow.

It was just two weeks ago that I woke up to a gunshot, only to find my mom, bleeding on the kitchen floor, a hole in the side of her head, a gun in her hand.

I'm not gonna lie, I knew it was coming. My dad was abusive, and my 8-year old brother and I were a pain in the ass, the family was poor, we had almost lost the house we live in. But that doesn't make it hurt less, that doesn't change the fact that my mom was the only friend I had.

I got out of the bed, throwing on a lose FOB shirt, a pair of black skinny jeans, and a leather jacket. The only one I had, covered with holes, before looking disappointedly into my reflection, aware of the ample flaws I knew I could not fix.

I opened my door and walked down the hallway. Careful not to wake up my dad, who I knew would end up in a fit of rage if I did. I stepped into my brother's room, sitting on his bed next to him and rubbing his back, getting him to wake up. He turned over and looked up at me and I gave him the most convincing smile I could.

"School, get dressed." I said as sweetly as I could. He nodded groggily, and got up slowly and walked out of the room and to the kitchen.

I always hated that room for reasons that you could have guessed.

I walked in anyways, my eyes already burning, and tears threatening to spill, but I didn't let them. I opened the cabinet and pulled out an apple for my brother. Not wanting to eat, myself.

My brother soon came walking into the kitchen, with an expressionless face. I gave him a half smile, which he returned, and handed him his breakfast. He took it half heartedly and started walking out the door. Neither of us really wanting to talk.

We walked to the bus stop, I watched him get out of the bus and walk into his school. That was when I decided to maneuver my earbuds through the back of my jacket and to my ears, knowing that I would need my music in class. I sat in the bus, looking out the window and enjoying the sound in my ears.

I was 17, putting me in 11th grade. I still didn't know how to drive a car, I still didn't know how to be "social", I still didn't how to work my life, period. And I was convinced that I never would.

I went through that day like I would any other day, sitting in the back of class, enjoying my music and pretending to work, although I was really just scribbling song lyrics onto my notebook. I knew my grades were shitty, but I could honestly care less.

It was in 4th period when a loud boom cut through the sounds I was enjoying. I wasn't sure what it was, but I knew it wasn't good. I immediately got up and started running out the door and down the street. The school didn't have any security what so ever which made that easy. It was then that i heard another boom from the other side of the town. And saw the fire start to spread, men in white suits with white rubber masks, black hair and red mouthes emerge from the fire.

I didn't think it was possible, but I somehow became even more determined to reach my brother's school.

When I was about a block away, I started to see all the kids, all around his age, coming out of the building. I immediately noticed my brother's bright blond hair from above the crowd and grabbed his arm. He looked up at me with concern, wanting to know what was happening, but I couldn't answer that question, seeing as all I knew was that I couldn't stay.

I ran as fast as I could, towards the edge of the town, where it was just desert, stopping at the 7/11 that had been abandoned due to the explosions and emptied by backpack of its useless books, notebooks and pencils onto the floor, doing the same to my brother's which he had with him. I stocked both our backpacks with food and water, mostly water in mine, giving my brother the lighter load.

We ran out the store together, his hand still in mine, dragging him through the streets. We were about 4 blocks away from the town edge when another crash am down from the planes up above, creating a mass of flames blocking out path. And I ran through them..... with my eight year old brother.

  I held him closer to my body, taking off my leather jacket and wrapping it around his arms, preventing the fire from reaching the skin it covered, leaving my arms exposed to the flames licking my skin as I felt the heat slowly rise and all I saw was red, my skin burning, beads of sweat almost blocking my vision, I continued to run until I felt a stop in the immense heat and the slightly cooler fire-free air touch my already blistered arms. I quickly looked down to check on my brother next to me who seemed perfectly fine due to the jacket that mostly protected from the flames.

We started to run again, after my brother handed my my jacket back.

We were 2 blocks away from freedom when we were met with two men in white. They both had what looked like white ray guns pointed at us. My brother and I began to back up away from the men when a shower of bullets rained from the sky in front of us, killing both the men and leaving holes in the ground.

We both ran forward, stopping at the bodies, I decided to grab the white ray guns which were in the men's hands and put them into my backpack.

We ran a little bit farther and saw the white car that the men must have come from. I stepped into the car and my brother got into the passenger seat.

Not knowing what to do, I pressed the black button next to the steering wheel and a sound of an engine starting came from within the car. I looked down and guessed that the pedals would make me go. There were three pedals, one on the right, another one right next to it and a bigger one to the left. I decided to press the pedal to the right with my foot, making the car jolt forward. I looked over at my brother who stared at me expectantly.

I pressed the pedal again, but with less pressure and the car started to move foreword slowly, I moved the steering wheel towards the horizon and gradually began to apply more pressure to the pedal. And sped off down the road, the burning on my forearms getting increasingly more painful, my brother next to me, bawling, me on the verge of tears myself.

Not knowing what to do next, I drove.