Darry's POVI walked in a daze feeling nothing but overwhelming sadness. I had hit Ponyboy, I hurt one of the people most dearest to me. He hates me, and I couldn't blame him. ''Darry, what areyou doing?'' Soda asked. I didn't answer, I didn't know how.Soda's POVDarry sure was acting strange nowadays. I know he misses Pony, but I know he's safe. My brother was smart, he uses his head more than Darry gave him credit for. I missed himsomething awful, the gangs not the same without him.Him and Johnny were so quiet we never really thought that if they were not there it'd have this much affect on us. But the gangs quiet now that there gone, even Steve misses them.Without him arguing with Pony he doesn't have much to talk about, and he doesn't goof around with me that much either. Two-Bits remarks weren't said that much, and we'd seen lessand less of his smile too. Now that's enough to even make me stop smiling, Two-Bits always so happy I thought nothing could get him down. Dally's even in a worse mood then usualwithout having Johnny at his side, but I know he knows where he is. No matter how stupid I am I can read people better than anyone I know. Its been four days since Pony ran away andDarry has been moping around here and more tense than usual.When he's at work I know he's been working harder than ever, as if he thinks that if he works harder Pony'll come home. I can tell when I give him his usual back rubs, he's sore andtense everywhere. Right now he was sitting on Pony and I's bed, holding Pony's pillow.I sat beside him, I wasn't use to seeing my brother so sad, he hardly ever shows his emotions so freely, most of the times I have to watch him closely to be able to tell what mood he'sin. Now it wasn't so hard. I missed Pony, and I wish he and Johnny was here to make everything go back to normal.I felt something warm slide done my cheeks, and relived I was crying. Darry looked my way and I wiped them off, I hated being the emotional one in the family. But I couldn't help it.''C'mere little buddy'', and before I could move he pulled me close to him and we both started bawling. I couldn't even remember a time he cried, nonetheless this hard.Darry's POVThe next day I tried to carry three bundles of roofing up with me, it hurt like hell. But I needed to preoccupied myself with something, otherwise I'd be thinking about Ponyboy. But itdidn't really help. I started to think about his smile, he had dimples like Soda, but not as noticeable.What if I would never see that smile again? His hair, oh how good his hair smelled! He didn't put as much grease as the other guys did, he didn't need to. At night when he sleptsometimes I would come in his room and smell his hair, then he would wake up and smile that gorgeous smile, and I would climb into his bed and scoop him up in my arms and sleepwith him. That was when he was five and had admired me, always asking if he would ever be as tall as me. I wonder if he would ever let me do that now? Last night I had the strangestdream, that I did that and he kissed my cheek. I kissed his cheek back, and then he kissed my forehead. I kissed his forehead back also, and then he kissed me on the lips innocently asif he did this all the time. I was to stunned for words, and when I opened my mouth to say something he did it again. Then soon we were making out on his bed, and then I woke up. Ikept on thinking about the dream a t work, maybe it means something?Could I have feelings for Pony like that, other than brotherly? It was getting dark around 7 o'clock, I had to ask for more hours, I thought sarcastically. I've been working since 5 am, andI felt like a living zombie. My legs wanted to snap, my back was going to callapse. But I kept working, I couldnt stop when there were bills to pay. Another hour went by miserably slow,and I felt if I climbed up another step I would die. ''HEY DARRY!'' a co-worker called below me.''What?'' I gasped, I couldn't waist my energy on yelling.''PHONE FOR YOU!'' He yelled back. I climbed down the ladder, if that's Soda saying to come bail him out for something stupid I'll faint."Hello?" I said once I got to the phone."Darry? Its Soda". Of coarse its Soda, who else would it be?"What Soda?'' I wasn't in the best mood."Pony's in the hospital, we need to come get him" What! "Darry, are you still there?""I'll be right there Soda, wait in front of the DX for me". I hung up, we'er getting Pony back!When we reached the hospital Soda busted all the doors open and ran towards the waiting room. He leaped through those doors and had Pony in a bear hug.I examined my brother, he had lost so much weight it was scary. I couldn't imagined all he'd been through because of me, and then I thought what if I would of los t him? Nothing wouldbe the same without my baby brother, I'd hate myself and be forced to go on living for Soda. Then as soon as Soda would move I'd kill myself, it'd be for everyone own good. I bet hehates me, I thought as I watched Soda and him hug . He parted from Soda and looked at me, probably thinking on a way to kill me in my sleep. He wouldn't have to though, I'd let himkill me right now."Ponyboy..." I said, my voice was so dry right now. My vision blurred, how long have I been crying? I turned away, afraid and expecting him to yell how much he hates me and how thisis all my fault."Darry!" he screamed, and the next thing I know he was hugging me. I hugged him back, shocked that he didn't push me away. "Darry", he began, "I'm sorry..."I pushed his hair back and tried my best to control myself, but failed miserably. "Oh, Pony, I thought we lost you...like we did Mom and Dad..."I cant believe my brother forgave me. He apologized, when he did nothing wrong. I didn't deserve him as a brother, and for that I will always love him. Hopefully not more than I should.
