Alone with my thoughts

Memories

Sitting on the edge of a cliff, beckoning me to slide farther and farther, waiting, until at last, I seep into it's grand beauty.

Hugging the walls of my cliff, I let my emotions go wild. What do I hide from? Why are these memories here, nameless, thoughtless memories, of a time when even I couldn't remember.

Wishing to know all, wishing to have no secret left untouched by my presence, I hurl myself into my own head. What will I find there? I wonder silently slipping in and out of awareness.

Will I see myself as a young child? Or will I be trapped inside of my OWN body, willing to know, I head deeper into the depths of my head. Until, at last, I find it. The memory that I don't recollect. The unforeseen thought, drifting into my subconsciousness.

When I face it, as bold as I seem, I am afraid. Do I wait, seeing what I se, or do I let myself fall, unprotected, into the depths of pain, hidden deep inside of my heart?

I sit. I wait. But nothing is happening. Why am I so scared? Waiting in what appears to be a bathtub? Gracious tones fill my head: How my parents love me, what they can do to help me with my friend issues, then I see what it is.

Sitting in the vast coldness of the slowly draining tub, I hear the sound of a shoe, flying, whistling through the air, and stopping abruptly as it hit it's mark.Slowly, I peek out of the bathroom, seeking the comfort of my Mother's arms.

Darkness. Knowing now, that the memory is over, I muddily get up from where I sit, and I think, deciding to go for a walk.

Praying solely for my memories to vanish, I hear a voice: " Don't be discouraged. These memories are just that: Memories. You can and WILL change this. Not for the past, and not for yourself. But for the future; for you children."