clouds // halsanie

c

ashleys pov

i unlocked the door and melanie stepped into my house and i watched her as she looked around. her eyes are so innocent. big and round- and brown- like a puppies.

"so- your room isss?" she reminded me of her presence, stopping my staring.

"up the stairs to the left- my rooms the first one. it says halsey on the door."

"ok ashlynn," melanie squeaked and walked up the stairs.
"ashl- oh whatever," i lowered my voice and i went into the kitchen and grabbed two water bottles, and some ice in a baggy, wrapped with a towel so it wasn't too cold at first, and took it up the stairs.

i walked into my room and melanie was sitting on my bed with a book opened on her lap. my book.

she looked at me, and i passed her a water and she quietly thanked me as i set the ice down on her wrist that was already bruising purple around the sides.

"room 93- by halsey. its a dream of mine to become a singer, those are all my ideas for songs, some of them i've already posted on youtube," i explain as she keeps reading, "you're cute whe-"

"shush," she snapped, "i have a few ideas too, but my voice isn't too great. i mainly write," she said softly, taking out a pastel pink faux-leather notebook from her bag.

i watched her as she flipped a few of the washed-out-pink pages- she was so delicate with them. she found the page she was looking for and handed it to me.

in a bubbly, yet manageable to read, mess of handwriting were the words 'rough love' across the top of the page.

and i read a few lines, and when i glanced up at her she was biting her lip, pressing herself to hold back tears that were threatening to fall- a look i never wanna see on her again.
she needed help.

and i pushed her back onto my bed, the ice fell off her wrist, but that wasn't a concern at all in that moment that her eyes poured into mine,
and i kissed her.
and i loved her.
i swear i did.
and she kissed me back.
and she smiled as i let go of her.
and she was gone.

she had snapped back into one of her moods.
"get off of me, you f-fucking fag-" she stammered, blinking wildly as if she couldn't believe what we'd done.

"melanie im not drew- i wanna help," i said, rubbing circles on her thigh with my thumb.

her voice changed.
her eyes watered.
and she asked for help.
and i kissed her again.
and she cried.
and i held her.