The Neon Lights Tour ( Camren ) & MORE

Chapter 13

Lauren POV

I woke up with camila snoring in my ear and i smiled a little... i wiggled out of her grip and got up streching ... i rubbed my eyes then went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I looked into the mirror and i felt a huge invisable wait on my shoulder. I stared at myself for what seemed like forever. I splashed water on my face but i still didnt wake up... not even a bit. i took a deep breath and walked out to the tour bus kitchen looking at the foods in the cabinte... My stomach dropped  " This will all make you fatter " A snarky voice in my head said and i closed the door... One of those days i see. I sat down on the couch and the walls of the tour bus felt as if they were getting smaller and smaller... I closed my eyes tight as my anxiety level rose... my breathing became uneasy and i let myself fall into the couch putting my hands on my face as a few tears came out ... why am i crying ?  .. i wonder to myself " because your a stupid bitch... why are you even alive?!" the voice says answering my question and i pulled my legs up to my chest hugging them... make it stop.. 

After a while i sat up too look at the window with tree's passing by quickly thinking how if i just stood in the middle of the street we were in i can die... so easily.... STOP! i scream to myself in my head closing my eyes tight trying to make the stupid thoughts stop but they come faster and faster... I jumped up running into the bathroom rummaging threw my make up bag for that one thing i need the most... when i finally found it i sat there looking at its shiney qualities and sharp edge.... hello old friend... 

I havent used this razor in about 3 months... Am i really going to kill that streak? Yes.... i slide the sharp edge across my ankle softly ... No body will see it here. 

"Nothing showed.. harder!" the voice in my head said and i closed my eyes and pushed the razor harder against my skin and slowly let it glide across... The door opened and i jumped up dropping the now slightly bloody razor on the floor " Not again " Camila said coming to me and my head dropped down on her shoulder " Im sorry.. " i said gasping for the air that escaped me when the door opened. 

Camila picked up the razor washing it off and throwing it out the small bathroom window that was slightly opened and she sat me on the toilet " What happened this time?" She asked but i just sat there with my head leaned against the wall and tears coming down my face as she cleaned my small cut. 

Camila POV

I woke up with no lolo cuddles and i pouted getting out of bed too find my princess. I looked across too the livingroom/ kitchen and she wasnt there.. Shes probably using the bathroom. I decided to scare her and i was smiling about to open the door and i counted in my head  " 1...2...3 " i opened the door quickly abuot to jump on her then i saw a curled up lauren with blood running down her Ankle. " not again " I whispered as my heart shattered and she jumped up. Her face went pale as a ghost. I walked into the bathroom and Lauren put her head on my shoulder breathing heavily as i moved my hand up and down her back " Im sorry " She said in between breaths and i hugged her quickly.. I took the razor from the floor and washed it off.. i didnt want lauren to use it again so i threw it out the small  bathroom window that was open.  I turned back to lauren who had a scared expression so i decided too take it easier on her this time. I sat her on the toilet and got cloth wetting it and wiping Laurens cut " What happened this time? " i asked curiously but Lauren stayed silent as her tears streamed down her face slowly.. i know she wasnt gonna talk just yet so i sat cleaning and thinking about this first time this happened. 

FlashBack < CamilaPOV> 

XFactor Live Shows! The judges have been harsh on us but we are working our booties off trying to get this right.. it has been stressful for us all but its totally worth it. i was walking around back stage while we were waiting to reherse just looking at everything.. it was amazing this experiance me and my new besties have. All the girls are usper sweet. Dinah is like my homie, Ally is very nice, Normani is my soul sister and Lauren.... Lauren is diffrent. I dont know why but whenever im around her i get butterflies in my tummy .. When she touches me i feel a shock but i would never ever tell her.. What if she dosent go this way.. i dont even go this way! Do i ?... Whatever too much thinking camila!

 My feet stopped walking when i head something odd coming fromt he girls bathroom... it sounded like.. crying. I went in to investigate. I opened the door slowly making sure i didnt make any noise and it was defiantly someone crying. I looked under the stalls and i saw a pair over Vans under one and then a drop of blood fell on the floor.. i gasped and the girl stopped crying " W-whos there?" She asked and i felt like i know this voice.. okay its defiantly one of the contestants " Its... Umm its Camila from Fifth Harmony.. im sorry i heard you from outside and i just came too... see who it was and umm im so sorry but you dont have to do this too yourself.. please open up i can help. " i said quickly.. i was nervous. there was silence for a few minutes and i put my hand under the stall " Please?.. itll be our secret just let me help " Whoever it was grabbed my hand and that familiar spark went threw my body " Open please?" I asked and she let go of my hand and the door unlocked... It slowly opened and too my suprise Lauren was standing on the other side " Oh my god lauren?! what are you crazy! " I said and she looked down as if her shoes were the most intresting thing " hey... Im here to help " I whispered lifting her chin up and she nodded with tear tracks on her cheek. We sat down on the bathroom sink counter and she put something in her pocket then sighed " So... i dont really know what to say but... " She giggles " Camila you dont have too im fine " She said getting up and turning the faucet on and rubbing her wrist under it " No we do... Why did you umm cut.. youself " I said slowly and she sighed " I was jsut stressed, no biggie " I rolled my eyes and turned off the faucet " yes big biggie! i dont want too see you doing this.. you know what Demi went threw " I said and she looked down " look Camila i appreciate this but just stop " She said with a hint of attutide " Lauren i care about you, you cant do this! promise me you will stop?" I say and she chuckled a little " ya i promise Camz.. i gotta g get.. " I cut her off putting my hand on her mouth so she would stop talking " Im soo serious Lauren Michelle Jauregui your going to stop this compltly. " I said sternly and she took a deep breath without saying anything after "Just come too me when you feel like doing it we will talk threw it " I said with a sympitetic smile and she nodded. i held her wrist where there was a freash cut and kissed it softly " Please dont do it again ill be so hurt " i said truthfully and she nodded again. After a minute of looking at eachother she hugged me tighter then she ever did " Thank you " she whispered and i hugged her back " I got you Lolo " 

After a few minutes she broke her hug and i planted a soft friendly kiss on her forhead " lets go there probably searching for us " I said and she nodded. We came out of the bathroom hand in hand and i felt billions of fireworks all over my body. I have to help this girl im falling for... 

<Present > 

I looked up breaking out of my thoughts and Lauren was looking out the window. Her Ankle had stopped bleeding and i stood up standing inbetween her legs and i held her cheeks so her eyes would look into mines " lauren talk to me " I said softly  " I got anxious the voices came back and.. yeah " She said and i kissed her cheek " You could have woken me up " i told her and she just nodded ' How are you feeling now?" i asked and she put her head on my chest so i just started playing with her hair  " Do you love me?" Lauren said with a broken voice sounding as if she is about to cry hard.. I back her eyes back to mine and i kissed her softly " I love you more than all the stars and galaxies in the night skies you know it too right here " I said pointing at her heart and a small smile appeared on her face " Promise not too leave me " She said and i held her tight " Never.. your stuck with me " She giggles and we walked back to our bunk .. it was still early so no one was up so we climbed back in bed cuddling.. she soon fell asleep and i kissed her all over softly... Lauren sometimes needs to reassure herself on how i feel about her and im happy to tell her. 

I watched lauren sleep for a while longer until i drifted abck to sleep myself glad that i could help her once again.

Note: Ok guys this was just a little chapter but what do you think want some mroe camren some Delena... Or some other stuff? let me know!