Getting You Back

Comtemplating

Riley's POV

"I have to go." Alfie says and kisses me on the lips. I have no idea where he is going but he left me on a date by myself. James would never do that, he would always try his best to spend time with me. Stop Riley, Alfie is not James and James is surely not Alfie.

I take a deep breath and started to clean up the date. I looked at the fondue and remembered that only a few minutes ago Alfie called it disgusting. This date was supposed to go great not horrible. I set this up to apologize to Alfie for calling him James. Twice. I know I'm dating Alfie but every time he does something it reminds me of James. I wish it didn't but it does.

The next day I avoid Alfie. After the previous date, I don't know how I feel about him.

I am sitting in my office when Michelle comes in. "Hi." She says. "Hi, look I'm really busy so unless it's important-" Michelle cuts me off. "Your not busy, Your avoiding Alfie. Why?" She asks curious. "Maybe because I don't know how I feel about him." I explain. "I know what's wrong here." "What?" I question. "You want Alfie to be James. Riley, you chose Alfie, now stick to it." She says and leaves. Michelle's right, I did chose Alfie but maybe I don't belong with him.

I finish my paperwork and send the dancers home. I drive to my apartment thinking about James the entire time.

I unlock my apartment I used to share with James. All the fun memories I had in here with him. Alfie could never replace James and why did I think he could?

I change into my pajamas and took off my makeup. I was walking toward my bedroom and looking at the pictures on the wall. Most of them were A-Troupe photos and of course, hanging up was my brighter brightest autograph in a frame. I smile at the memory and open my bedroom door. The room has a chill but nothing to cold. I bump into my dresser as I wasn't paying attention and knock something off of it. I pick it up and immediately tears escaped.

I pick up the little picture and set it down on the dresser. It was just after Internationals. James and I never told anyone. Not a single person knew. I sometimes wonder if that didn't happen, I would still be with James and not Alfie. I know I hurt James badly and I hurt Piper too but this may sound selfish but I don't want to get hurt or anyone else. If I decide to get James back, Alfie will get hurt and if I don't, I will suffer. My heart isn't in the right place anymore and if I stick with Alfie, I'm not sure if it will ever be again.

I fall asleep almost instantly because running the studio is exhausting, I do not know how Miss Kate did it for all those years.

I wake up to the sound of my alarm going off. I groan and don't feel like getting up but I have to. I throw the sheets off of me and I feel my bare feet touch the cold wood floor. I stand up, grab my outfit and make my way to the bathroom.

Once I change into my clothes, I comb my hair and start making some breakfast. It consisted of an orange, and cinnamon oatmeal. I grab my purse and call a taxi because I couldn't find my keys to the car. I soon arrive at the studio and pay the taxi driver and walk down the corridor to The Next Step Studio.

I unlock the green metal doors and do the same with my office. I switch on the lights and walk straight to my office.

I have baby ballet class to teach in about half an hour so I'm just going to do the checks for the Regionals money.

I opened the drawers where the box with the Regionals money is and a small silver chain falls out, I pick it up and see that it's the necklace James gave me for our anniversary. I remeber throwing it in there after James and I broke up. Well, After I broke up with James. I look at the silver heart necklace in my hand . I remember that day perfectly, After we cleaned up the mess of our painting duet we went to James place and cuddled up on the bed when James suddenly placed something around my neck and saw that it was the necklace his grandma gave him.

She told him he should give it to the love of his life . He promised me he would always love me no matter what and that he would do anything for me. That night wasn't only our first promise of infinity love but also our first time sleeping together. It was such and amazing night but sadly we couldn't keep our promise.

My flashback was interrupted by a feminine but snappy voice . "Miss Riley. Baby ballet has started almost 15 minutes ago . Do you think I pay so much money for my kids to wait for their teacher!" One of the mothers from baby ballet said. Honestly, I think they have a lot of hate for me. Everything I do is wrong and bad and not a good example for the kids and it is REALLY getting on my nerves. "I'm sorry Mrs. Carter, I got lost in thoughts, I'll be there immediately" I answer in a friendly tone. I don't want to start an unnecessary fight. She huffs at me before walking a way . I sigh, great way to start the day Riley.

After baby ballet, I led A and B troupe rehearsals and did some paper work and finally finished all the checks and uniforms for Regionals. I start to pack my things but my hand hit the necklace I found earlier again I slowly put it around my neck . I don't know why but it just felt right and a smile forms on my face as I touch the heart shape with mine and James names engraved on it . "Hey" Someone says and I jump slightly and turn around to see Alfie standing in the doorway of my office smiling.

"Hey" I say back as he sits on the chair in front of me. "What's that " he asks suspiciously and points to my neck. "Alfie look I- " I try to say but he cuts me of "Riley listen. I'm so fed up with you constantly changing your mind about us. Can you finally choose what you want from me cause what ever  game you are playing it's annoying the hell out of me!" He yells shocking me. "Alfie, Do you think it's easy for me? I'm so confused at the moment and it's not helpful when everyone tells me what to do when I'm not even sure what I want!" I yell back . "Why is nobody seeing it from my perspective? Every one thinks it's easy to decide or move on and let me tell you that it's not! Especially when you don't know who you really are anymore!" "Its not easy to be played with either so tell me when you're done playing with other people emotions and finally stop being so self centered" He says coldly and walks out. I feel the tears stream down my face and I put my head in my hands. James was never this harsh to me. He would have hugged me or would have given me space. It's harder to move on from James than I thought and if I'm being totally honest I'm staring to rethink my decision to break up with James.

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