if anyone dont understand.... the first part is LEO, second and third r N
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They say you have devil on your one shoulder and angel on the other... Maybe it's true, because the more he came to view, the more my emotions decided to divide into two part, competing against each other to make the other lose.
My devil and angel were my brain and heart... Funny even now I call my heart the angel....
If someone were to ask me about why I was that frozen at that time by seeing someone that I had been looking for, what was I to answer them? Because....
"Would it be too dramatic to say that I'm waiting for the final showdown.." He giggled before again looking up at me, the trace of the giggle still evident in his eyes he shrugged one shoulder,
"Waiting for you...Leo.. No.."
He chuckled as the last trace of the smile even left his eyes and I perked my eyebrows.
"My bad... It seems your colors are back...how can I still call you that.... "
A smile again flashed on his feature, that never reached his eyes, he sweetly replied,
"Waiting for you Taekwoon-sshi...I think we have some things to clear up over here?"
I found myself unable to make any decision to what expression was I to show at that moment. If I were to describe the emotions it would be impossible to understand what went beneath my shell. My traitorous mind handed me an entire list of emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant, and I just stared into the space unaware of what to choose.
Has anyone ever felt like this?
I suddenly felt weak on my knees, I kept my face lowered. Could he see it? Could he see the mixture of emotions that appeared in my eyes? Almost like a mixture of sugar and salt. Can you differentiate between them when they are together? Do they taste good when the amount of salt and sugar was equal? No... For me it didn't either.
I didn't like the sigh of relief that escaped my lips when I saw him. But just in a second got replaced by anger because I again saw him.. How I felt happy to see his beautiful smile but meantime felt irritated to know that he was there smiling while I suffered my whole life for him. The aggravating feeling of hearing the name Taekwoon from his lips or the overwhelming feeling of hearing that name again from those lips of his that I thought would never be able to hear only a few moments.. No... From 15 years ago... I didn't know what emotion I should have showed at that time. Fury or jolly.. I got stuck in between... I didn't like any of it...
Because I felt like my emotions betrayed me.....
"Ever seen a stained paper?" his voice a bit brighter than usual, I looked up, he still smiled.
"By stained I mean the ones that are stained by ink, only one long stroke by brush in the whole page... "His steps slow as he walked towards the ledge.
"They are really troublesome you know? It makes you feel confused, to throw it out or not to. If you decide to throw it out, you feel like what a waste, it's only one stroke.. But to keep it, you know it's useless already."
"what?"
"My life is like that...a stained paper.... A long dark blue stroke across it...I decided to throw it away...... But someone said that it was only one stroke... one...no it would be wrong to say someone, two people told me... their words.... Then I decided to preserve it ... but...but now when I'm standing here, I'm not sure about trusting one among them... why did he say that?"
